What Bill's Been Doin'

Blue Valentine (January 5, 2010)

2011-01-20T21:40:00.004-05:00

NOTE: This blog entry is taken word-for-word from my entry from my other groovy blog, Scranton & Wilkes-Barre in Entertainment, which you should totally check out.

On January 5th, I took a day trip to New York City to see Blue Valentine; at the time, the film was playing in a total of 4 theaters nationwide (NYC and Los Angeles) but has slowly been expanding. Since I am more familiar with midtown/uptown Manhattan (it was also playing at the Angelika Film Center downtown on Houston Street), I opted to see the film at Lincoln Plaza Cinemas on Broadway and 62nd Street. The 3:30 matinee was packed, and the actual screen size was on the smaller side and some of the image went above the white screen (more on that later).

Blue Valentine is a love story that intercuts between the beginning and (possibly?) end of the relationship between house painter Dean (Ryan Gosling) and nurse Cindy (Michelle Williams). And I thought the film was absolutely superb. Not only did the performances blow me away, but the story just ripped my heart out.

The scene filmed in the Reference Department at Albright Memorial Library on May 13, 2009 appears about an hour, 10 minutes into the film during one of Cindy's "past" sequences. Dean had previously given Cindy his business card with a personal message written by him on the back. While seated at the table with classmates in the Periodicals Room (you can recognize the chairs, tables and even magazine holders--or Princeton Files--in the background), Cindy's on-off boyfriend Bobby (Mike Vogel) snatches the card out of her hand. I mentioned the framing issue previously because I did not see any of the stained glass windows of the Albright Memorial Library building--but maybe I just missed them out of sheer excitement.

The exterior of the Albright Memorial Library building itself also appears in the background of a scene about 30 minutes into Blue Valentine. As Michelle Williams is riding the bus alone to meet Bobby, you distinctly see Albright Memorial Library as it passes through the bus windows. At first I wasn't 100% positive that it indeed was the library, so I asked Dan Flosdorf, who was responsible for the sound design, sound editing, and the re-recording mixing of Blue Valentine, via Dan's Twitter and he told me via a tweet, "I believe it is."

As of Friday, January 14th, Blue Valentine was only playing in limited release in 230 movie theaters nationwide, but it is expected to expand wider (most likely including Cinemark in Moosic, which plays a lot of art films in its CineArts series) as the critically acclaimed film gains well-deserved momentum during awards seasons.

www.bluevalentinemovie.com
twitter.com/danflosdorf

The Divine Sister (Saturday, December 4, 2010)

2010-12-13T18:13:00.005-05:00

The hilarious The Divine Sister was my last NYC show in 2010 (as well as my first show of 2010). Went with my friend Anna to see it at the SoHo Playhouse. Just as great as (if not better than) seeing it the first time. For the blog entry on my previous visit to NYC to see The Divine Sister, click here.

The first time below Houston Street for both of us. Had a delicious brunch at AquaGrill (food and service were wonderful), spent over an hour at the Strand Bookstore, and hardly any people traffic to speak of in SoHo. Took us about 40 minutes to get a cab back uptown (they change shifts between 4 and 6 PM, I've learned); once back uptown, you couldn't move because of all of the tourists and people dressed as characters (I spotted 5 Mickey Mouse(s)--Mickey Mice?--in the span of one block). Couldn't get a seat in a restaurant. No more Midtown in Decembers EVER!

The Addams Family (Wednesday, November 10, 2010)

2010-11-12T15:07:00.006-05:00

I hate Christmas shopping. So instead of yuletide bargain hunting, each year I treat each member of my family to a show in NYC. This past Wednesday, I took my niece heather, my sister Lisa, and my mom to see the matinee of The Addams Family on Broadway (front row center).

The hit show was notoriously trashed by critics, but what do they know? It was a lot of fun, very funny, and so much better than theater critics led me to believe it would be. After all, the only Broadway show I saw and despised with Tony-winning and critical darling Spring Awakening, which was atrocious (despite a good score by Duncan Sheik and the bare breasts of a pre-Glee Lea Michelle).

The original musical, based on the legendary New Yorker cartoons by Charles Addams, tells the story of the macabre family headed by Gomez and Morticia (played delightfully by Nathan Lane and Bebe Neuwirth) living in their Gothic mansion (now relocated to Central Park). Their daughter Wednesday falls in love with a "normal" young man and they plan to marry, but not before the the potential in-laws have dinner with the "creepy" and "kooky" Addams family.

Though similar in story of La Cage Aux Folles, the show was a lot of fun. All of the performances were top-notch, the scenery was spectacular, and my fellow audience had a blast. And, of course, seeing Nathan Lane and Bebe Neuwirth perform together right in front of you was a thrill. And the rest of the cast were equally awesome. Jackie Hoffman as Grandma was a riot, Kevin Chamberlain was amazing as Uncle fester (and stopped the show with The Moon and Me), Krysta Rodriguez and Wesley Taylor (as Wednesday and her suitor Lucas) were great together (their duet, Crazier Than You, had me cheering).

My favorite moment of the show was the beginning of Act II, when Morticia (Bebe Neuwirth) and I shared a "moment." Act II opens with Morticia singing her big number and showstopper (Death Is) Just Around the Corner. I bought the CD recording a few weeks back and, for some reson, that song stopped me in my tracks and I immediately uploaded it to my iPod. After the first verse, Morticia jokes "Get it? Coroner. Death is just around the...CORONER," which makes me LOL every time I hear that line. Also, when we had our pre-theatre lunch at Olive Garden on Times Square, I told my family about the joke in that song. Their reaction? "I guess we know what we'll be hearing from YOU all day."

So when Bebe Neuwirth said the "coroner" joke, right there in front of me, I couldn't help myself and burst out laughing (I think I was one of the few in the audience to get it). Then then was a pause, Bebe looked at me, pointed, and said, "HE gets it!" BLISS!!!

Check out Just Around the Corner (Coroner) below (and see The Addams Family on Broadway):

www.theaddamsfamilymusical.com

The Pee-Wee Herman Show (Saturday, October 30, 2010)

2010-11-01T11:03:00.003-04:00

I took my niece Bailee and my nephews DJ and Zachary to NYC this past Saturday to see a preview of The Pee-Wee Herman Show. We all LOVED the show; I was laughing so hard there were tears in my eyes.

La Cage Aux Folles (September 1, 2010) AKA 2005 Vs. 2010

2010-09-10T15:49:00.005-04:00

La Cage Aux Folles Playbill signed by Kelsey (Frasier) Grammer, A.J. Shively and @BwayCagelles Matt Anctil and Terry Lavel

My friend Anna and I sipping Frrrozen Hot Chocolate at Serendipity 3 in New York City before the show.

My friend Anna and I, both librarians, have been planning a trip to NYC together for years and years. FINALLY, while we were both on StayCation, we finally made plans to see a Broadway show. So last Wednesday, we took a trip to The Big Apple and caught the matinee of the acclaimed revival of La Cage Aux Folles, which we both loved.

I saw the original revival of LCAF back in 2005, and it was one of the most horrendous theater-going experiences in my life. The show itself wasn't bad--music and lyrics by Jerry Herman and book by Harvey Fierstein (the only famous person I ever met who was unequivocally a rude asshole, but talented) and adapted from the acclaimed 1978 French film (which was remade in the 90s as the hit film The Birdcage). But I had two major problems with it--one, it was at the Marriot Marquis Theater, which was too big a venue for a show set in a nightclub; and two, the two old cunts behind me (think a pair of Snookis in 60 years), who would not shut up during the entire first act ("Oh, theya gonna sing I Yam What I Yam" and "Woodja look at those outfits?!")--so much, in fact, that my friend and I complained at intermission--the usher spoke to both of them and they were mostly silent throughout the second act. So of course, when they revived it a mere 5 years later, I was skeptical.

But to my delight, 5 years later, his time it was different...and SO much better.

After lunch and some nommy Frrrozen Hot Chocolate at the legendary Serendipity 3 (once a favorite hangout of Andy Warhol and Marilyn Monroe), we taxied down to the Longacre Theatre for the 2:30 matinee, where we were graciously greeted by a stunning blonde drag queen who sprayed us with a water gun (it was a very hot day in NYC).

Based on the acclaimed revival at London's Menier Chocolate Factory, the current revival of La Cage Aux Folles was wonderful. Playing in a smaller venue (unlike the huge Marquis Theatre) was better suited for the show, complete with four tables surrounding the stage to give a suited nightclubby feel to the show (Anna and I had front row center seats, which was perfect), the show is set in pre-Aids 1970s St. Tropez. The focus of the show still had glitz, but the main focus was the characters and family. Georges (Kelsey Grammer) is the proprietor of the sensational nightclub La Cage Aux Folles, whose drag act stars his partner of 20 years, Albin (Douglas Hodge, reprising his role from the West End revival). When Georges's son Jean-Michel (a superb Broadway debut by A.J Shivley) arrives home to announce his impending marriage to the daughter of a majorly conservative politician, all hell breaks loose.

The performances were spectacular all around, and the Cagelles were a sight to behold in their club performances. And again, the smaller venue and the fact that no bitty bitches were behind me chatting their dentures off really added to my complete enjoyment of the show.

After the show, I introduced Anna to the art of getting autographs of the performers at the stage door; she was reluctant at first, but she got into it very quickly. We got our Playbills signed by Kelsey (Frasier) Grammer (who only signed about 8 Playbills--mine and Anna included--before heading into a waiting car), A.J. Shivley (who was very nice) and two Cagelles (Matt Anctil and Terry Lavel).

In short, I'm glad I gave La Cage Aux Folles another try with this revival. In the right circumstances, the show is one of the best theater-going experiences somebody can have. It made me almost forget and forgive the 2005 revival. In hindsight, the only positive that really came out of seeing it in 2005 is now I only see Broadway shows when I can get seats close to the stage, where bad behavior is a no-no. God bless Patti LuPone :)

Promises, Promises (May 15, 2010)

2010-05-30T13:15:00.008-04:00

I took a solo trip to NYC on Saturday, May 15th after I was able to get a 4th row center seat to the hit Broadway revival of Promises, Promises. Great show and a lot of fun.

Of course critics had a field day with the show. Some called it dated (even though it's set in the early 1960s, DUH), and one particular Newsweek writer (probably a failed actor himself) complained that the openly gay lead Sean Hayes (Will & Grace) did not pull off a convincing performance as a heterosexual. Well, fuck him too.

Hayes was GREAT as Chuck Baxter, a young NYC businessman and bachelor desperate to climb the corporate ladder. Promises of advancement look...well, PROMISING, when he makes available his one bedroom bachelor pad to several married executives who want to have a little fun on the side with their secreteries . Chuck falls in love with pretty waitress Fran (the wonderful Kristen Chenoweth), who also works at the company and, unbeknown to Chuck, is having an affair with his boss (played by Tony Goldwyn). The show, based on the 1960 Best Picture Oscar winner The Apartment, also features a standout performance by Tony nominee Kate Finneran as a barfly in an owl feather coat who has her eyes (and drunken claws) set on a good time with Chuck.

Great performances all around, a timeless score by Burt Bacharach (I'll Never Fall in Love Again) and even a couple of extra Bacharach hits added to the score (I Say A Little Prayer, A House Is Not A Home).

And the best part was the show was FUN. Sometimes Broadway patrons just want to have a great time at a fun show without having it be didactic--and Promises, Promises delivered on all of its promises (no pun intended) to me.

Afterwards, I got my Playbill signed by Tony Goldwyn, Tony nominee Kate Finneran, and the awesome Kristen Chenoweth (see pic above; thanks, Dawn).

The Complete Metropolis (Saturday, May 15, 2010)

2010-05-23T09:18:00.005-04:00

www.kino.com/metropolis

Ray's Garage, Inc: As CROOKED As The Day Is Long

2010-03-26T12:45:00.007-04:00

All I wanted was a Chicken Tetrazzini T-Shirt for my birthday.

I ordered one on December 18th, 2009 from Ray's Garage Inc--if I had only known (SIGH). I've NEVER ordered something online and never received it...until I decided to patronize Ray's Garage, Inc.

I ordered online and paid by personal check via snail mail. No response from Ray's Garage Inc. When I finally got one after 10+ emails inquiring where my order was...in MARCH 2010 (remember, I placed my order in DECEMBER 2009)...I was told the item would me mailed out the following day with a tracking number.

March is almost over..and still no fucking T-shirt.

Maybe his iron is broken...but most likely, the proprietor of Ray's Garage Inc is one of many Internet crooks bilking people out of money under a facade of a fake website.

So do yourself a favor. If you want a really cool t-shirt you'll never receive, and if you want to kiss $25 hard-earned dollars goodbye, order from Ray's Garage Inc.

But if you want an actual t-shirt, make one of your own on Cafe Press.

To get conned, visit www.raysgarageinc.com or his fraudulent Facebook page (where I discovered I'm not the only one that has ordered from this sham of a company and didn't receive the merchandise he paid for).

$25 buys a lot of wisdom. Thanks, Ray's Garage, Inc!

UPDATE 5/29/10 Good news. After nearly 6 months, I got a refund check from Ray's Garage Inc. But no T-Shirt.

UPDATE 1/20/11 Believe it or not, right before my birthday and OVER A YEAR LATER, my Chicken Tetrazzini t-shirt arrived in the mail. Nice shirt, but not worth waiting a year for, even when I got it for free after the refund. Will still never buy from them again.

And thanks everyone for your comments. It's good to know I wasn't the only one who had trouble with Ray's Garage Inc.

The Divine Sister (2-13-10), And How I Discovered The Joy That is the Writings of Charles Busch

2010-02-14T19:34:00.016-05:00

Me and my favorite author, playwright Charles Busch.

Me and the divine Julie Halston.

It all started with Greta Garbo. In 1990, I watched Ninotchka for the first time and fell in love with Garbo, seeing each of her films multiple times. As a matter of fact, I went to eight screenings of her films at her 100th birthday retrospective at Scandinavia House in NYC in 2005 (I even sat next to her niece and sole heir Gray Reisfeld at the screening of Camille). 2005 also saw the release of a DVD box set of Garbo's classic films, including an original documentary simply titled Garbo.

In the documentary Garbo, a gentleman spoke about how he encountered and observed (from a distance, of course) the reclusive star at a Japanese store in NYC--wonderful story and wonderfully and vividly told.

I then noticed that this gentleman seemed to appear in every documentary about every classic screen actress ever--Garbo, Joan Crawford, Bette Davis. All I knew of whom I later found out was Charles Busch was that he seemed to know classic movies and he had excellent taste.

Cut to a year later. My employer, Albright Memorial Library, purchases the DVD of the documentary The Lady in Question is Charles Busch. It was watching this film that I learned that Charles Busch was not only an expert in classic Hollywood cinema, but he was an accomplished playwright and actor as well. I learned that Busch was the man who penned the acclaimed plays The Tale of the Allergist's Wife, the book for the American transition of Taboo (the Boy George musical), and several comedy plays in the 1980s I remember seeing ads for in the New York Times as a kid--like Vampire Lesbians of Sodom (still one of the longest-running off-Broadway plays in theater history). The supplemental material, as well as the documentary, included several rare clips of performances, mostly with Busch and Julie Halston, who had just such wonderful comedic chemistry between them).

The documentary showed that Busch led a fascinating life, both on and off the stage. Amazing that Busch only became a writer and playwright as a necessity--if no one was going to cast him in a really good play with a really good part, he would do it himself and cast his friends--hence the formation of Theatre-In-Limbo in the mid 1980s.

After seeing (and buying my own DVD of) the documentary and hearing the cleverness and magic of his dialogue, I went to Amazon.com and ordered an anthology of his plays. And I was hooked. The writing was so funny and original and each piece was completely different from the next. I've been an avid reader all my life, but this was the first time in a long time that I truly enjoyed reading and looked forward to it. There have been authors I read and read and read (like Sue Grafton and her alphabet mystery series), but Busch's writings weren't a continuation of each other or anything like that. It was just wonderful and original writing. When I finished the 5 plays in the anthology, Charles Busch was my favorite writer.

I'm a completist by nature. So one by one, I bought his remaining plays not included from Samuel French, a publisher of slim volumes of individual plays for actors and regional performances. Reading these plays just painted these wonderfully vibrant images in my head, often making me laugh out loud. I also was attracted to the fact that there were elements of Mr. Busch's play that were very Garboesque (e.g. the setting of Shanghai Moon was similar to Garbo's silent film Wild Orchids; Queen Amarantha featured the title character dressing like a boy and abdicating her throne, as Garbo did on screen in 1933's Queen Christina). I also purchased, read and loved Busch's semi-autobiographical novel Whores of Lost Atlantis (loosely based on his theater days in the mid 1980s and the creation of his early plays at the East Village's Theatre-In Limbo).

All of a sudden, I discovered something I never truly had, even as a librarian and an avid reader--a favorite writer. My favorite plays written by him (hard to choose) are The Lady In Question, Red Scare on Sunset (which challenges the reader/audience to emphasize with and root for a protagonist who was a McCarthey sympathizer), and You Should Be So Lucky (one of Busch's few male roles in which not only does he inherit a great deal of money, but he gets to keep it in the end--even though he chooses to give it to charity--which NEVER happens).

The documentary also showed in the numerous clips that Busch was one hell of an actor. Casting himself as the lead, almost always a female character, Busch's style of acting evokes both the great ladies of the golden age of Hollywood (Shearer, Crawford, Davis and--dare I say?--Garbo herself).

At the end of 2007, it was announced that Charles Busch would be performing in NYC in a revival of his play Die! Mommie! Die! I scored a front row seat for one of the last Saturday matinee performances in January 2008. It was off-Broadway, but the venue New World Stages was located in the theater district. I, of course, loved the play and seeing Mr. Busch perform in person was absolutely fantastic--he was everything you ever wanted him to be--both as a performer and as a writer.

2009 saw the announcement of a new original play by Mr. Busch titled The Third Story, co-starring himself and Kathleen Turner. My only worry was that the play was being performed WAY downtown at the Lucille Lortel Theater on Christopher Street in Greenwich Village. Now I had never been further downtown than Penn Station at that point (lower 30s) (where I meet my friend Kirsten when she arrives from Trenton on our frequent visits to The Big Apple together). I was determined to see the The Third Story but I was a little nervous--I mean, the theater was in an area of the city where the street were no longer numbered--would I get lost? Would I find the theater? Would I be able to get back to Port Authority on time to get my bus?

Luckily, all went well. I had a front row seat and I really loved the play. Busch and Kathleen Turner were awesome together, but secretly I must admit I kept picturing Julie Halston in Turner's role, especially when I read the play when it was published by Samuel French later that year. The play incorporated a mother/son screenwriting team, a sci-fi film, and the tale of Baba Yaga in such a unique and hilarious way.

Cut to December 15th, 2009. I'm reading my Theatermania.com news from my Bloglines. An article appears announcing Mr. Busch had written a new play titled The Divine Sister--AND he would be reuniting onstage with none other fellow Theater-in-Limbo founder Julie Halston. FINALLY, I was able to see in person the magic of Busch and Halston together that I've seen in the filmed clips on the Charles Busch documentary. I asked Kirsten if she wanted to go with me, found a pre-order code from the Divine Sister Facebook page (thanks to my few Facebook friend, Julie Halston), and scored two general admission tickets for the Saturday, February 13th, 2010 matinee.

I met Kirsten at Penn Station and, after a stop at Sketchers in the theatre district, we took a cab downtown for some Chat N' Chew (a cool restaurant near Union Square famous for its Holy Cow Burger), book shopping at the Stand Bookstore (a first visit for the both of us), then to the Theater for The New Cit y on 1st Ave, between 9th and 10th Streets.

We picked up out tickets at the "Will Call" desk, where we were informed that even though the seating was general admission (no assigned seat tickets), every seat in the theater was great because it seated only 75 people. He also said that a couple of seats were reserved.

After waiting in line for 10 minutes (and getting bumped by a bitchy queen), we were allowed into the theater and immediately grabbed two unreserved front row seats. There was no stage, so Mr. Busch, Miss Halston and company would be working their magic a few mere inches from us.

I must say that The Divine Sister is now my new official favorite play by Charles Busch. The story follows a group of nuns at St. Veronica's convent/Catholic School in mid 1960s Pittsburgh. There's the mysterious Sister Walburga (2 time Tony nominee Alison Fraser) who arrives from Germany with unspoken plans for the school; postulant (nun-in-training) Agnes (of God, get it? (Amy Rutberg) is convinced she has religious visions (visions of saints in urine stains on a student's tightie whities, etc) and can perform miracles; and the straight-laced, no-nonsense Sister Acacius (the divine Julie Halston) finds herself tempted to act on some forbidden desires of her own. The glue holding all together is the indomitable Mother Superior (Charles Busch), who is determined to get funding to build a new school--even if it means hassling the self-proclaimed recluse and wealthy Jewish woman-turned-Atheist--but we learn that Mother Superior has some secrets of her own.

The Divine Sister was hysterically funny in both all of the excellent performances and its tribute to every Hollywood nun movie ever made--from Agnes of God to The Song of Bernadette to The Sound of Music to The Trouble With Angels--even down to a hysterical lip-synching to the ROTFL Dominique/Do-Re-Mi inspired parody "Trinity of Harmony". Best of all, I got to see Live and In Person the magic of longtime collaborators Charles Busch and Julie Halston work their theatrical magic together.

After the show Miss Halston came out to the lobby and we spoke for a bit and had our picture taken together (thanks, Kirsten). Then, to my absolute delight, Charles Busch came out and spoke to us for a bit, signing my Divine Sister ad card and posing for a pic with me. Both Julie and Charles were so sweet and so nice and everything you would want people you admire so much to be. A lot of what we said was a blur, and the parts I can actually remember was so wonderful and special that I think I'll keep it to myself (sorry, faithful blog readers---both of you).

The Divine Sister is playing an exclusive 24 performance engagement at the Theater for The New City in NYC, which is completely sold out for the remainder of its run. There is a waiting list for each performance, so I suggest you get to New York City, by any means you can, and get in line--you'll thank me.

www.theaterforthenewcity.net/divinesister.htm
www.CharlesBusch.com

Wishful Drinking (October 17, 2009)

2009-10-18T20:49:00.009-04:00

Every October for the past few years, my friends from college Kirsten and Stasia meet up in New York City and catch a show, usually in the front row (don't ask me how I do it). Unfortunately, due to circumstances (scheduling, etc.) we were unable to get together. But being that I haven't been to the Big Apple since May, I decided to take my mom for the day. And I must surmise at the conclusion of our day, that unexpected events relating to the show were just as fascinating as the show itself, which was superb.

For some reason, the show I really wanted to see was Carrie Fisher's one woman show about her life titled Wishful Drinking, playing for a limited run at Studio 54 in NYC. I always liked Carrie Fisher. Of course I loved her as Princess Leia in the Star Wars Troligy (Cinnebon hair . metal bikini, English accent that came and went, etc.), even though I'm not a die-hard sci-fi head. But what I really loved her in as an actress was her film comedies like When Harry Met Sally and Soapdish. But most of all, I really and appreciate her as a writer, such as her novels Postcards from the Edge (one of the best books I ever read).

I did read the book Wishful Drinking, her autobiography released last year which served as the basic outline for the show. To be honest, I was a little disappointed in the book because it seemed short and sketchy, as opposed to the detailed work of her fiction.

But again, for some reason, Wishful Drinking was the one show on Broadway I really, REALLY wanted to see. So I told myself, "Bill, if you can get front row seats to Wishful Drinking, you'll keep your scheduled trip to NYC, even if you have to go alone."

Wishful Drinking is being presented by the Roundabout Theater Company, where prime seats are usually available to subscribers first; then, if the subscribers decide they didn't want to attend a particular show, the prime seats (including front row center) go on sale to the general public--usually the best seats become available 2-3 days before the show. So every day for two weeks, I would go to the Roundabout website and see if front row center to the Oct. 17th Saturday 2 PM matinee miraculously came up for grabs. I didn't expect this and I couldn't believe it. Unlike Ticketmaster or TeleCharge, where the site selects the tickets for you) tickets from the Roundabout shows are selected from a seating chart of the theater showing available and purchased seats. So last Friday night, I went on the Roundabout site, just for the hell of it; and, miracle of miracles, seats 101-102, aisle seats, front row center, were miraculously available. So after dry heaving a couple of times, I asked my mom if she would like to go (Manhattan is always better with company than alone, plus I owed her a birthday present), she said yes, and I selected the two available front row seats, threw them in my online shopping cart, and paid as quick as I could and opted for the tickets to be held at the box office for us.

So after worrying about potential snow, getting sick, etc., Saturday morning came without any major problems or deterrents and we were on our way. I was SO excited.

When we got to NYC, my mom and I walked to Studio 54 and picked up our tickets. Then we did some shopping (what's a NYC trip without shopping?) and went to lunch at Sardi's my favorite restaurant in NYC, where I had made reservations.

At about 1:30, after a little more shopping, we trekked back up to Studio 54 for Wishful Drinking. Slowly but surely, we got to the ticket taker, the we were directed by the theatre usher to our seats. That's when the day's only potential problem was averted.

The problem, of course was our seats. Our tickets were front row on the aisle, row AX, seats 101-102. The only problem was that there was no seat AX 101 so, in reality, I had a ticket for a theatre seat that actually didn't exist. After slightly panicking, the usher told us to sit in seats 102-103 and assured us all would be fine; however, an old woman already had seat 103, and her ticket stated as such. The usher told her to move down a seat and everything would even out (they were used to this because it happened at every show; why they didn't get some masking tape and cover the numbers and write new ones is beyond me). But the woman in seat 103 was quite irate (and loud and quite vocal in her old lady irration) and went to speak to the manager, who basically reiterated what the usher told us. The last thing I wanted to do was inconvenience anybody, but I paid for a seat, damnit. While 103 was off somewhere, her companion was far more rational; she sweetly turned to my surprisingly calm mother and sweetly told her, "Well, if that's the biggest thing we have to worry about in life, we're pretty lucky." Wise words, I must say and, ironically, a running theme throughout Wishful Drinking. When 103 returned to her seat, she was a lot calmer and assured that the seating was fine, and she was as sweet as pie to both my mom and me from that point on.

I also notice in my Playbill that today's matinee would be the second of only two scheduled performances of Wishful Drinking that would include a sign language interpretation by an organization called Hands On!; so a signer would be performing in the left orchestra for the deaf and hard of hearing. We could only see her if we looked back and to the left because, of course, we were in the front row.

One positive review of the book Wishful Drinking (I think it was Entertainment Weekly) suggested that the book is most affective if someone read it aloud to you. After seeing Carrie perform her piece, I agree. Just hearing her tell her life story in her own words was so much more fleshed out to me, and so fascinating. Carrie states that, if anything, her life story will make you look at yourself and say, "My life isn't as bad as Carrie Fisher's."

And what a life it was. The daughter of America's sweethearts, Debbie Reynolds and Eddie Fisher, Carrie's life was unusual from the beginning. her father left her mother for Elizabeth Taylor (the widow of his best friend) when she was a toddler; she quit school to work in the chorus of her mother's Broadway show; she became a culture icon at 18 for her role as Princess Leia in Star Wars and has had her likeness merchandised as everything from PEZ dispensers to anatomically correct figurines to a sex doll), she has had crippling bouts with depression; she was married to and divorced from legendary musician Paul Simon, followed by a marriage to a man (and father of her daughter) who claims she turned him gay; she was diagnosed as manic-depressive, then bipolar disorder; she woke up one morning a few years ago and her friend's dead body was laying next to her in her bed; and has even had two rounds of electroshock therapy.

But she still has her humor. And by laughing at herself, she allows her audience to guffaw right along with her, which is one of the things I love about both her and her performance of Wishful Drinking.

Now some highlights from the show itself:

After the customary announcement about your cellphones, unwrapping your candy, and taking pictures during the performance (all theatre no-nos), the lights went up on the stage to reveal a living room liek set, a couch and table on one side, and a comfy chair on the other. Then Carrie Fisher took the stage from a door at the back of the stage, which doubled as a screen that projected photos and film clips throughout the performance. Dressed in blue satin pajamas and a colorful robe, and with glitter in her hair and eye makeup), she sang a beautiful rendition of Happy days Are Here Again. As she sang, he descended the stairs on the left hand side of the stage and began to throw handfuls of glitter into the faces of the audience members in the left side of the front row. At this point, I turned to my mother and told her, "I doubt she'll do that to us." Five seconds later, Carrie was face-to-face with my mother and threw a handful of glitter in her face and hair. Then she stood in front of me and, to my excitement, threw glitter in my face and hair as well. As she finished the song and climbed to the stage again, she stated, "I am Carrie Fisher and I'm an alcoholic." Thunderous applause. She then took off her slippers and performed the rest of her show barefoot (something Bea Arthur did also during her own one-woman show).

About five minutes into the show, when Carrie was relating a particularly hilarious episode in her life, a cellphone went off in the back of the theater. Carrie kindly asked, "Please turn your phone off." But the cellphone continued ringing. Finally, another man in the front row shouted, "TURN YOUR CELLPHONE OFF ALREADY, YOU JERK!" No more ringing. Carrie was so thrilled by this man (his name was mark) that she grabbed something from the table on the stage and gave it to him--a voucher for a free drink at the bar during intermission.

Carrie went back to her hilarious monologue without missing a beat, and she even encouraged the audience to shout out questions as she related the story of how she woke up one morning to find her best friend passed away from AIDS in her bed.

Next, a huge blackboard covered with a family tree of headshots descended from the ceiling, detailing her Hollywood lineage and the marriages, divorces, etc. of her family (she lovingly referred to this section as "Hollywood Inbreeding"). She addressed the question, "And what happened to the marriage of Liz and Dad?" to the audience. She then stood in front of my mother and asked her, "What's your name?" My mother responded, "Mary." Carrie continued, "Mary can you tell me what happened to their marriage?" Surprised out of her ass, my mother Said, "They got divorced." Carrie told my mom to come forward, she pulled a "Winner" medallion necklace from the back of the blackboardappy Days Are Here Again. and, as she did to Chewbacca, Han Solo and Luke Skywalker at the end of the first Star Wars, placed it around my mother's neck. it was fucking awesome. Carrie then blew a kiss to my mom and said, "Mary, I'm not done with you yet." For the rest of the family tree section of the show, when discussing the beginning or the end of a relationship, she again addressed my mom and asked, "And what happened then, Mary?" At first, my mother was speechless, so I whispered to her, "She got married" or "She got divorced." Carrie looked at me and said, "No you can't help her."

After this hilarious part of the show, the stage went dark, with a short clip from Star Wars played on the door/screen behind her and, when the lights went up, Carrie was wearing the famous Cinnebon Princess Leia wig. She talked about the pressures of being a cultural icon (including an image of a metal bikini-clad reclining Leia statue that revolved to revealed, as Carrie put it, "my shaved crotch)." After displaying images of various Leia memorabilia on the screen, a life-size Princess Leia sex doll descended from the ceiling (Carrie explained this gave new meaning to the term "Go fuck yourself") and, "being that I don't have a penis, " she asked for a male audience member to come up on stage and demonstrate how it works. Someone actually volunteered, but the doll ascended again and a duplicate Leia wig appeared in its place. Carrie made the volunteer put on the wig and read a little card that hilariously closed the first act of the show.

At intermission, I stopped in the lobby, glitter still in my hair, and bought a poster for the show; then I stepped outside for a couple of cigarettes. A couple of the other smokers stopped me and told me I "wore my glitter well" and they seemed ecstatic when I told them my mother was the infamous "Mary" that Carrie Fisher spoke so lovingly to. On my way back in, I stopped and bought a Wishful Drinking t-shirt for my mom. I also asked the salesman if carrie even comes out after the show and signs autographs. He said sometimes, but not usually after matinees. But he directed me to the Studio 54 stage door on 53rd Street, "just in case." When I got back to my seat, my mom stopped chatting with 103 for a moment as I gave her the shirt, which she loved.

At the end of Act II, Carrie concluded her show by reciting her famous "Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi" speech to a stuffed R2D2, which IMHO was the ONLY way to end the show.

For some strange and wonderful reason, my mother is a good luck charm when it comes to getting autographs after a Broadway performance--for some reason, it worked with David Hyde Pierce after Curtains and, to my shock and delight, it worked with Carrie Fisher. We went to the stage door, doubting Carrie would actually come out and sign (I even told my mom, "Don't be disappointed if she doesn't come out. We'll just wait 15 minutes, then go get something to eat."

There was alreadyquite a crowd there already, mostly people with no Playbills in their hands and bags filled with Star Wars merchandise. When the stage door manager came out and said, "Cariie IS coming out, but she will ONLY be signing Playbills," I was ecstatic. As you can probably imagine, half the people waiting (those who hadn't just seen the show and just wanted Princess Leia and Star Wars memoribilia signed) turned around and left..which left my mom and me right in front of the line.

Then carrie came out. She started to sign my mom's Playbill, then she looked up to find the infamous "Mary" staring at her, and Carrie exclaimed, "OH, IT'S YOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!", then added the word "Mary" to her autograph. Carrie told my mom she really appreciated her being such a good sport for all of the "Marys" throughout the show. Then she signed my Playbill; I told her I loved the show and she kindly thanked me.

Now I'm re-reading Wishful Drinking and loving it even more than the first time. It's very, very close, wordwise, to the live show, but I am enjoying it so much more picturing Carrie Fisher in my mind performing the piece.

Wishful Drinking is running on Broadway for a 12-week engagement that will end at the beginning of January. I highly recommend you get tickets for the show ASAP (it doesn't hurt to wait a few days before the performance to see if front row opens up, and prepare yourself for possible aggrivation if you happen to get ticket AX 101) and laugh your ass off!

9 to 5: The Musical (Saturday, May 9, 2009)

2009-05-13T20:30:00.003-04:00

A week after it officially opened on Broadway, my friend Kirsten and I met up in NYC to see 9 to 5: The Musical. Based on the classic 1980 film with Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton (who wrote the score for the new stage version), 9 to 5 tells the story of three secretaries who are held down and harassed by their boss--" the sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot" Mr. Hart. Due to extraordinary circumstances, the three end up kidnapping Hart and changing their workplace for the better in his absence.

The show followed the film pretty closely. it was hysterically funny, with standout performances from Allison Janney as Violet (Tomlin in the film) Stephanie J. Block as Judy (Fonda in the film) and Megan Hilty as doralee (Parton in the film). Parton's songs were really great too.

An awesome day in my favorite city with my best friend seeing an awesome show...and we didn't get swine flu either :-)

www.9to5themusical.com

CHICKEN TETRAZZINI!

2009-04-20T20:02:00.001-04:00

The Third Story (February 28, 2009)

2009-03-01T12:11:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, I ventured below 28th Street in NYC for the first time to catch the new play by my favorite playwight (and favorite author) Charles Busch titled The Third Story at the Lucille Lortel Theater (MCC Theater). The amazing cast of 6 featured Busch, Kathleen Turner (performing with a cane due to a fall after a performance last week), Jonathan Walker, Sarah Rafferty, Jennifer Van Dyck and Scott Parkinson--all were fantastic in multiple roles requiring lightening fast costume and character changes.

The play centers on a mother and son screenwriting team hiding out in Nebraska. The constantly (and hysterically funny) arguing team attempt to write a new vehicle for a particular Hollywood actress (Charles Busch)---including a hard boiled detective story which melds into a sci-fi story about cloning, and the classic Russian tale of Baba Yaga (also played by Charles Busch). Like TV channel surfing, the false starts and mishmashing of the first two concocted stories results in the third story, which really takes off and parallels the mother-son relationship of its authors.

Front row seats, the amazing pairing of Charles Busch and Kathleen Turner and a superb supporting cast resulted in a truly original, hilarious and touching play about relationships, Hollywood, and the true insanity of one's imagination.

Shrek: The Musical (January 10th, 2008)

2009-01-11T20:55:00.006-05:00

I scored third row center seats for the Saturday matinee of Shrek: The Musical--and I wasn't about to let a little snow stop me. So I went to NYC and met my best friend Kirsten for brunch and to see the show, which just opened last month.

All I can say is that Shrek: The Musical was FANTASTIC and totally worth travelling through a blizzard for. And you can't ask for a better review than that.

Check out Morning Person by Sutton Foster, who playes Princess Fiona, which opens Act II.

Scandal (1989)

2008-12-29T18:44:00.008-05:00

In London in 1959, 18 year old nightclub dancer Christine Keeler met Dr. Stephen war in London. They began a platonic friendship, and Ward introduced her (and some say pimped her) to high government officials, including Secretary of War Jack Profumo and Russian spy Eugene Ivanov. Three years later, when Christine and Stephen had a falling out, Keller sold her story to the British tabloids, shaking the very foundation of the Parliament and toppling the then-reigning British Conservative Party.

I actually first saw Scandal in the movie theater when I was fifteen. I also distinctly remember one of the ushers mentioning casually that they had to throw a guy out during a previous showing because he was found masturbating in the theater. Yes, Scandal is a very sexy and very titillating film but, compared to even most PG-13 films today, the sex in Scandal is quite tame; but an orgy scene from the film had to be trimmed to get an R rating (rumor has it that a couple was actually having sex on a piano in the background).

Even then, I found Scandal to be a truly engrossing true story covering a part of history I wasn't familiar with.

Last night, I decided to watch Scandal again and I was surprised how remarkably well the story and the performances held up nearly 20 years after it was released.

Scandal remains an excellent and engrossing film with a stellar cast headed by John Hurt as Dr. Stephen Ward, Joanne Whaley-Kilmer as Christine Keller, Sit Ian McKellen as Jack Profumo, and Bridget Fonda in one of her first starring roles as Christine's friend Mandy Rice-Davies.

Scandal was released on DVD briefly by Anchor Bay Entertainment in its original uncut and unrated version, and I'm so glad I purchased it when it was first released, because used copies of the DVD now go for s small fortune on Amazon.com (I believe it was discontinued because Miramax reacquired the rights to the film, making this DVD--as well as other Anchor Bay titles of Mirimax Films such as Tie Me Up! Tie me Down! and The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover--highly collectible and sought after). If you could locate a copy either on DVD or VHS, Scandal is a flick definitely worth watching.

Check out the trailer for Scandal below, and click here to see the video for the theme song Nothing Has Been Proved, produced by the Pet Shop Boys and performed by the late, great Dusty Springfield--the video features scenes from the film, archival footage of Christine Keeler and others involved in the Profumo scandal, and those famous Dusty Springield hand gestures.

Kitchen Man by Bessie Smith (MP3) (1929)

2008-12-26T21:08:00.006-05:00

In addition to the frivolous shit I bought on iTunes with the card I got for Christmas, I also bought some songs that I really genuinely love like Bessie Smith's classic ode to food (and maybe sex?) Kitchen Man.

Recorded on May 8, 1929, Kitchen Man is a song dripping with sexual innuendo in the guide of the story of a rich woman begging for her Kitchen Man to stay in her employ. On the surface, Kitchen Man is an innocent song, but put it in the filthy minds of modern listeners (maybe even to some in-the-know back in 1929, when Smith originally recorded the song) and food becomes symbolism and double-talk for sex and various body parts which would make even Kanye West blush (God, I hate him).

Take a look for yourself:

Madam Bucks

Was quite deluxe;

Servants by the score,

Footman's at each door,

Butlers and maids galore!

But one day Dan,an'

Her kitchen man,

Gave in his notice, he's through!

She cried, "Oh Dan don't go,

It'll grieve me if you do".

I love his cabbage, crave his hash,

Daffy about his succotash,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

Wild about his turnip top,

Like the way he warms my chop,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

Anybody else could leave

And I would only laugh,

But he means that much to me,

And you ain't heard the half!

Oh, his jelly roll is so nice and hot,

Never fails to test the spot,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

His frankfurters are oh so sweet,

How I like his sausage meat,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

Oh, how that boy can open clams,

No-one else can catch my hams,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

When I eat his doughnut,

All I leave is the hole!

Any time he wants to,

Why, he can use my sugar bowl!

Oh, his baloney's worth a try,

Never fails to satisfy,

I can't do without my kitchen man!

So are these lyrics the filthiest you've ever read...or is it just me?

Sneakernight by Vanessa Hudgens (MP3) (2008)

2008-12-26T19:36:00.005-05:00

"Basically, what we're gonna' do is dance.
Basically, what we're gonna' do is dance.
Basically, what we're gonna' do is dance.
Basically, what we're gonna' do is dance."

Do you know those things (whether it be DVDs, knick-knacks or MP3s from iTunes) that you would never spend your own hard-earned money on, but you would also happily buy if someone else paid for them? Well, with the iTunes card I received as a "stocking stuffer" for Christmas this year, I decided to buy both songs I really, really wanted, as well as opted to splurge 99 cents on cheesy songs I would other wise never buy.

Being that my TV is almost always tuned to E!, I was bombarded by this horrible commercial for Red by Marc Echo, selling sneakers to the tween set. And starring in the commercial was none other that High School Musical star herself(and Zac Efron's "decline to confirm" steady), Miss Vanessa Hudgens. And, like water after a swim, I could not get that horrid song (identified as "Sneakernight") out of my head. So, you guessed it, I purchased it on iTunes last night.

In a 15 second commercial, Sneakernight is tolerable, even cute. As a two minute, fifty-nine second song, it makes me want to rip out my eardrums and stomp on them until they're crushed into tiny little pieces.

Miss Hudgen's "vocals" on "Sneakernight" are the audio equivalent to Cheese in a Can--and it's served on a Ritz Cracker of cliche-ridden lyrics and topped with a techno beat resembling an olive found on a dirty floor in a second-rate pizza parlor.

Okay, this isn't poetry--but, then again, neither is the song. Far from it.

The song ends with an annoying and unnecessary giggle from Vanessa--can she possibly be laughing at lil' ol' me for paying a penny short of a dollar for the privilege of listening to her singing about dancing in overpriced sneakers?

However, with all of this being said (and lord knows I hate to admit such a thing), I still find myself bopping along to "Sneakernight." It's catchy but, then again, I have to remind myself that so is herpes.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, music has come to this. I'm just glad I didn't pay for it with my own cash.

Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)

2008-12-25T09:40:00.014-05:00

Since I couldn't sleep light night--I was either high on Christmas spirit or high on the sugary goodness of PEZ--I decided to pop in the DVD for Gremlins 2: The New Batch. This time, however, the focus of the movie is less on the scares and more on the all-out comedic aspects of the story and the mischievous gremlins.

Picking up 6 years after the original 1984 film ended, Gremlins 2 begins with Gizmo mourning the death of his master, the owner of the Chinese shop in Chinatown where Billy's father purchased him. With his master's death, the store is destroyed to make way for a new Chinatown shopping centers. Gizmo narrowly escaped, but is nabbed by twin scientists in the midtown NYC skyscraper owned by pseudo Trump real estate tycoon Clump (John Glover). Also coincidentally employed at the Clump megacenter are Billy Peltzer and his girlfriend Kate (Zach Galligan and Phoebe Cates, reprising their roles from the original Gremlins)--she as a tour guide and he as a graphic artist.

The Clump Center (a "smart," high-tech skyscraper) houses a huge mall, a television station, apartments, offices---and a genetic engineering lab, where Gizmo is being held captive by the twin scientists and another mad scientist (the legendary Christopher Lee). Billy discovers where Gizmo is, rescues him, and places him in a file cabinet in his office. However, due to a malfunctioning water fountain and water mixed with Billy's paint, Gizmo gets wet and multiplies. This time, either because of the paint mixed with the water or the "genetically altering" NYC tap water, the clones are multicolored--both physically and personality-wise. There still is an evil Stripe, but there's also a country bumpkin with huge teeth, a nutty Gremlin much in need of Ritalin, etc. And before you can say Big Apple, they have eaten after midnight, metamorphosed into gremlins, and multiplied into thousands thanks to the building's sprinkler system. Once again, it's up to Billy, Kate, Gizmo, Mr. Clump and the visiting Futtermans (Dick Miller and Jackie Joseph, reprising their roles from the original film) to save NYC before sundown, when the gremlins will inevitably wreak havoc all over New York City.

Although the original 1984 film will always be superior, I really enjoyed Gremlins 2 because it wasn't simply a remake disguised as a sequel--director Joe Dante (who also directed the original Gremlins) did his best to make Gremlins 2 was as radically different from the first film as possible; and for the most part, he succeeds. Here, the special effects are more elaborate, the humor is more over-the-top (even poking fun at the "rules" of the original and satirizing Kate's Christmas sob story from the 1984 flick), and there are lots and lots of visual pop culture references (from The Phantom of the Opera to The Wizard of Oz to Batman).

The most radical difference between the first film and the sequel is the primary focus of the flick being moved away from Gizmo (who has almost a secondary role here, mostly in brief sequences of torture and pushed "over the edge," ala Rambo, by the gremlins) and primarily put on the new batch of gremlins. The multiplied gremlins break into the genetic engineering lab and sample scientific concoctions that modified them further in hysterically unique ways--one turns into electricity, one sprouts wings like a bat, one becomes a humongous spider, one drinks "brain serum," dons glasses and gains the ability to speak intelligently. Discovering exactly what they would transform into next was the highlight of the movie.

Also clever was when, halfway into the movie, the gremlins break inside the movie projector (or TV for the home video release, available as an Easter Egg on the DVD), make shadow puppets, and screw up the image and sound.

What didn't work for me in Gremlins 2? Well, little things. I didn't like how all New Yorkers were stereotyped as rude, neurotic and cynical; nothing can be further from the truth, IMHO and experience as a seasoned NYC tourist. I also didn't particularly care for the secondary story of a Grandpa Munster-esque horror movie host on Clump TV that wants to break out and be taken seriously as a reporter. But perhaps what I liked the least was the sequel cliche of celebrity (or this this case, pseudo-celebrity) cameos from the likes of Leonard Maltin and Hulk Hogan.

However, overall, Gremlins 2 really works because it is so different from the first film and branches out in funny and outrageous way--making for a truly enjoyable viewing experience for an insomniac.

Emmett Otter's Jug-Band Christmas (1977)

2008-12-24T23:12:00.005-05:00

After my family and I exchanged Christmas presents tonight (Yes, we always exchange presents on Christmas Eve), I gathered the nieces and nephews together to watch a Christmas DVD. I decided that our movie choice would be Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas for two reason: one, I have the DVD in my collection; and two, my nieces and nephews had never seen it.

I forgot that the special was actually made in the 1970s, because HBO showed it all the time in the 80s. It's a special that I rarely see on TV around Christmas time, like other classic specials like Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol. I also remember that this Jim Henson production featured Kermit the Frog prominently as both a narrator and commenter on the story. However, on DVD releases (particularly the version in my DVD collection), the Kermit sequences have been expunged completely (I've learned this is so because the rights to the frog are now owned by Disney, an entirely separate entity from Jim Henson Productions). Though I'll never again see the special as complete as from my childhood due to this loss, it's still a wonderful holiday program.

All Ma and Emmit Otter are poor but happy. They've already hocked all of their valuables; and Emmit's late father, a snake oil salesman, left little to the family when he died--just a toolbox for Emmit to do odd jobs around town and a washtub for Ma to take in laundry. But they travel the river singing songs and even partake in the ice slide his father built years ago.

With Christmas coming up, Emmet really wants to buy his mother a piano, and Ma wants to buy Emmet a guitar with "mother-of-pearl" inlay, but neither has the money to buy any presents for each other at all.

When the town hosts a Christmas talent competition with a first prize of $50, each must make a sacrifice to even qualify for the contest--so Emmet puts a hole in his ma's washtub to create a bass for his jug-band, and Ma hocks Emmet's toolbox to buy material for an outfit to wear to the competition. However, little do they know until the night of the talent show that they are actually competing against each other for the grand prize--and only one can win.

Both the nieces and nephews and I really enjoyed Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas, humming and even singing along to the catchy songs (such as Bar-B-Que and Ain't No Hole in the Washtub). They also pointed out the special effects used with the limited technology they had in the 70s, such as combining shots of marionette characters with strings for long shots and actual Muppets for close-ups.

I think it still holds up as great yuletide special with a strong message about the selfless sacrifices one is willing to make to make a loved one's Christmas a little merrier, even in the bleakest of circumstances.

My only point of grief, besides the excising of Kermit, is that (for some reason or other) several scenes have either been edited or completely cut out (for example, when the mayor's wife is rude when Ma delivers her laundry, Ma says aloud that she wishes she would fall off the dock--for some weird reason, this is now included as a deleted scene in the Bonus Features section of the DVD). I only hope both Disney and Henson Productions follow the message portrayed in the story and eventually release a complete version of this merry holiday treat.

Gremlins (1984)

2008-12-24T12:59:00.007-05:00

I decided to kick off Christmas Eve with one of my favorite Christmas-themed movies ever...Gremlins. I remember seeing Gremlins in the movie theater back in the Summer of 1984 (I was 10 years old) and being absolutely enthralled with it from start to finish. Though it's not your typical Christmas movie, I still see no reason why it's not included on ABC Family's annual 25 Days of Christmas.

While on a business trip in New York City, gadget inventor Rand Peltzer (Hoyt Axton, who also wrote the song Joy To The World by Three Dog Night) ventures to Chinatown to purchase an unusual Christmas present for his son Billy (Zach Galligan). He discovers a cute and unusual little creature called a Mogwai (coincidentally, what Ashlee Simpson recently named her firstborn). After much pleading, the reluctant older Chinese owner of the shop agrees to sell the Mogwai (who Rand nicknames Gizmo), but warns him of the responsibility of owning a Mogwai and the three rules that must be followed:

1. Keep him away from sunlight, especially sunlight.
2. Don't get him wet.
3. Most importantly of all, never, NEVER feed him after midnight.

Back in Kingston Falls, bank teller Billy is thrilled with his new pet and immediately grows attached to Gizmo. However, Billy's friend accidentally gets Gizmo wet, which makes him multiply. The five new Mogwai, led by Stripe (who has a white strip of fun on his forehead) are cunning and vicious. Then the new Mogwai trick Billy into feeding them after midnight.

The next morning, the Mogwai (except for Gizmo) are in cocoons, as they transform into scaly green monsters called gremlins. When they hatch, they wreak havoc, both deadly and humorous, to the small quiet town on Christmas Eve. And it's up to Billy, his girlfriend Kate (Phoebe Cates) and Gizmo, to stop Stripe before he can multiply infinity.

The cast also includes Judge Reinhold as Billy's stuck-up co-worker, Polly Holiday (Flo from the classic sitcom Alice) as the vindictive Mrs. Deagle,, a young (and pre-addict) Corey Feldman as Billy's friend, and the legendary Dick Miller as Billy's alcoholic, all-American neighbor Mr. Futterman.

Gremlins was produced by Steven Spielberg, written by Chris Columbus (director of Home Alone and the first two Harry Potter flicks), and directed by Joe Dante (who also directed the sequel, Gremlins 2: The New Batch in 1990).

Also noteworthy is that, although rated PG, Gremlins was one of the films that led the MPAA to create the PG-13 rating a year later in 1985. Some of the scenes are a little gross, especially when Billy's mother kills three of the recently transformed Mogwai in her kitchen (one with a blender, one with a knife, and one by microwave).

Even over twenty years later, Gremlins still holds up as an awesomely entertaining movie. It's cute and there are a few genuine scares, but it's also incredibly funny.

It was nice to relive one of my favorite childhood movie going experiences--gore and all--on this lovely Christmas Eve morn.

And it definitely deserve a Blu-Ray release. So I guess what I know what I'm asking Santa for next Christmas.

Merry Christmas!

The House Bunny (2008)

2008-12-21T20:22:00.004-05:00

As I advance in age and become a cranky old bastard, I find myself going to the movies less and less, preferring to just buy movies on DVD or Blu-Ray. The House Bunny is one such movie that I really wanted to see during its theatrical run. But, like I said, I'm getting old, and your fellow moviegoers that watch the movie with you have become quite disrespectful over the last few years. Kicking your seat, talking and texting, letting their infant scream rather than take them out to the lobby. My absolute favorite type of moviegoer (sarcasm, of course) is the Roger Ebert wannabe that just happened to take the seat directly behind you and who feels obligated to give you his friend unsolicited audio commentary on the film. Rather than be like Roger Ebert, I would much rather they were like Gene Siskel...dead.

That was mean. What I meant was dead silent.

Therefore I very much prefer viewing movies on DVD or Blu-Ray on my HDTV in the privacy and comfort of my own home. I can still have the audio commentary, but on DVD it's usually done by someone interesting associated with the film, and it's optional---you can turn it off whenever you want (unlike the asshole who always ends up sitting behind me at Cinemark.

That being said, I decided to purchase the Blu-Ray of the recent hit comedy The House Bunny because it looked really funny, plus I'm a fan of E!'s The Girls Next Door (who have a series of cameos in the flick, along with Mr. Playboy himself, Hugh "Puffin" Hefner), and it came with a strong recommendation from my niece Heather (who saw it in the movies with her boyfriend---silently, I hope, except for the funny parts, when she is permitted to laugh).

The House Bunny tells the story of Shelly (Anna Faris, is a truly hysterical performance), a Playboy Bunny who lives in the lap of luxury as the fourth of Hef's Girls Next Door at the Playboy mansion. Shelly is turning 27 with a huge party at the mansion and a birthday wish to be Miss November.

The morning following her part, instead of being honored with her own pictorial, Shelly receives a letter from Hef kicking her out of the mansion. Left with nothing but the clothes on her back (or is it off her back?), Shelly comes across a street with a dilapidated sorority house belong to the sorority Zeta. The six members of Zeta are all a bunch of stereotypical social misfits (the smart pretty leader who resembles Lindsey "firecrotch" Lohan; the sarcastic Goth chick; the butch hick from the sticks; the short girl; the body brace girl; and the mute). Being that it does not have the minimum 30 members to retain its status as an official sorority on campus, Zeta is in danger of losing their stats on campus and their house to a bunch of uppity snotty coozes from a competing dorm.

Being an unwanted orphan herself, both as a child and as a fallen Bunny, Shelly accepts the position of house mother of Zeta and sets about saving the sorority from demise. With her help (from makeovers to philanthropy), Zeta becomes the most popular sorority on campus--but at the cost of the girls' personal identities.

The House Bunny was quite a funny flick, anchored by Faris's hilarious portrayal of Shelly. Former American Idol runner-up Katherine McPhee and Bruce and Demi's daughter Rumer Willis also give standout performances, in their first major film roles, as two of the sorority girls. Surprising cameos by Beverly D'Angelo, Christopher McDonald, and Holly, Bridget, and Kendra from The Girls Next Door also contributed to the overall fun of the movie. Colin Hanks (Tom's son) also gives a good performance as Oliver, Shelly's potential love interest.

Though the fish-out-of-water comedy is far from original (there are elements of 1984's Revenge of the Nerds, 2001's Legally Blonde, and even Shelley Long's 1988 amusing bomb Troop Beverly Hills), The House Bunny was a really funny comedy with a heart that just wants to make you laugh and succeeds.

Too bad I didn't see it in the movies but...well, you know.

Christmas Disco by P.K. & The Sound Explosion (LP) (1977)

2008-12-19T21:37:00.006-05:00

It's been said that the original is always the best. This can, oddly enough, be applied to Christmas disco albums.

On a fluke, I picked up Christmas Disco by P.K. & the Sound Explosion on a trip with my brother to Main Street Jukebox in East Stroudsburg. Granted, I picked it up on a whim as part of a 15 for $10 used vinyl sale. I simply thought of it as the final piece of the Holiday Disco trilogy that began with the fun of the 1978 LP Christmas Disco and continued with the truly shitty Yuletide Disco from 1979. Little did I know that this "new" version of Christmas Disco, which I just burned from vinyl LP to CD, was actually the first Christmas Disco album released (1977). And I really didn't expect it to be the best of the three.

Why did I like this one the best out of the three, you ask? First of all, the brevity (total running time of the LP is 22 minutes). Secondly, each side was a seamless nonstop medley of secular Christmas songs (unlike the "all over the place" song choices on Yuletide Disco), the fun non-religious ones that are impossible to offend once Christmas time became "The Holiday Season." Thirdly, unlike the previous two, the songs on 1977's Christmas Disco are sung all the way through by a trio of female singers with really awesome voices (think The Ritchie Family or Darlene Love)--in short, the recording is more vocal and less instrumental.

Most of the songs are quick temp (Jingle Bells, Sleigh Ride, Winter Wonderland), while others are slower and gravitated towards a less-disco and more R&B sound (like White Christmas).

Definitely my favorite of the three holiday disco LPs (burned to CD) that I mentally danced away the snowstorm with today.

Now if only I can get my hands on a vinyl copy of the ever-elusive Disco Noel and make my collection a quadrilogy.

Yuletide Disco by Mirror Image (LP) (1979)

2008-12-19T18:35:00.006-05:00

Following the audio orgasm that was Christmas Disco, I had such high expectations for Yuletide Disco. Released one year later in 1979, Yuletide Disco was the more famous of the two LPS and featured a very intriguing cover of a flashy disco queen moving as four. The eggnog-on-vinyl is credited to Mirror Image, a studio band responsible for several discount soundalike LPs released in the 1970s (including Sounds Like the Bee Gees and Sounds Like Olivia Newton John).

So it's with heaviness of heart that I have to write that Yuletide Disco sucks ass.

The song selection isn't nearly as good as the far-superior Christmas Disco . The LP kicks off with Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree, which sounds more like a 50s sock hop than a disco track. The instrumental Twelve Days of Christmas is dull and feels like it will go on forever. And can you image boogieing down such less popular Christmas tunes like Good King Wenceslas and O Tannenbaum? The low point in an album full of low points in We Three Kings--with inappropriately slow breathy vocals on the versus followed by rushed choruses (with one singer of 3 or 4 embarrassingly holding the note on "Star" of "Star of wonder") throughout the entire chorus--which is slimier to most Stevie Nicks songs (have you ever noticed how Stevie Nicks squeezes 17 syllables in a line structured for 5?) And don't even get me started on the disco version of Auld Lang Syne, which probably left even the trendy folk at Studio 54 suicidal on New Year's Eve.

Yuletide Disco is an example of an overworked concept that should've ceased with Christmas Disco--maybe if it did, disco would still be alive today instead of all of that shitty rap music that pollutes the airwaves of today.

That being said, the LP is okay. I don't miss the dollar I spend on it, but talk about high expectations being crushed finer than 70s Columbia coocoodust.

Christmas Disco by the Mistletoe Disco Band (LP) (1978)

2008-12-19T17:54:00.008-05:00

On this snowy Friday before Christmas, in between watching E! and surfing the net, I decided to get in the yuletide spirit by listening to Christmas Disco by the Mistletoe Disco Band, which I'm assuming was a studio band looking to make some extra money for either holiday shopping or a healthy supply of nose candy.

I purchased this questionably classic vinyl LP at a used record store on one of my brother JR and my frequent music shopping excursions. I remembered the classic cover of a sexy blond chick in Santa Claus garb from my childhood. It's funny the things you remember and the things you block out.

I suppose it was inevitable in the 70s, when everyone was recording disco music (even non-disco acts from the Rolling Stones to Rod Steward to, God help us, Ethel Merman), that record producers had the brilliant idea of combining two great tastes that taste great together--music inspired and fuelled by mirror balls mixed with cocaine...and St. Nicholas.

The LP, which was originally released in 1978 when disco was at its peak of popularity (or hatred, depending on your musical tastes in the 70s), is a collection of primarily instrumental holiday favorites set to a disco beat, complete with Christmas bells, festive violins, and a cheesy vocal group chiming in with "ooohs" and "ahhhs." The vocals are similar to background vocals on a karaoke CD because they tend to come in on the chorus or the second verse--preferring the music to speak for itself, I suppose.

But the shocking thing is that Christmas Disco isn't half bad. Sure it's a product of its time (the glorious late 70s, which I have all but blocked out---I'm more of a child of the 80s), but the tunes are quite catchy in their disco reincarnations. I even found myself rocking out to the pulsating grooviness of it all, in a way I rarely do in public. Sure it's sick and wrong (as my friend Justin says), but no one ever said the holidays were pretty.

Highlights include Sleigh Ride, Jingle Bells, Santa Claus is Comin' To Town, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and the sexiest version of The Little Drummer Boy I've ever heard (it's a slow jam, with whispered "ra pa puh pums".

I ended up burning Christmas Disco from vinyl LP to CD, paired with the lesser Yuletide Disco, to easily enjoy this timeless album with ease throughout the holiday season.

In short, Christmas Disco was a dollar well spent, in my humble opinion.

Whoever said "Music doesn't stand the test of time" has obviously never listened to Christmas Disco. In hindsight, being that holiday LPs and CDs are rereleased every holiday and prominently displayed in music stores, I'm surprised that the disco stars that have fallen out of public favor since the end of the 70s haven't recorded full-length Christmas albums. If they had, they would have been guaranteed a big, fat royalty check every year.

Still doubt me? Well then, experience the timeless holiday magic that is Christmas Disco below with "Winter Wonderland," the first track on Side B of the original LP.

Muse by Grace Jones (1979) (LP)

2008-12-17T22:27:00.005-05:00

Christmastime, 2007. I was torn between buying an HD-DVD player (now extinct) or a Blu-Ray Player. Then I found something I thought was better than the two of them combined (also now extinct). I opted instead to purchase a combination Vinyl Record Player/CD Player/CD Burner.

Why? Well my rationale at the time was the fact that there were so many records from the 1970s and 1980s (some even earlier) that I wanted to purchase on CD but, for one reason or another, they were never deemed worthy of a CD release.

Muse by Grace Jones, her only album never released in the CD format, proves my instincts for this alternative purchase were correct.

Released in 1979, Muse was the third LP in the Grace Jones Disco Trilogy (preceded by 1977's Portfolio and 1978's Fame) that poured through the speakers of Studio 54, where she was a regular performer. Only a year later, Grace complete reinvented her sound with the Compass Point Trilogy, influenced by punk and reggae (1980's Warm Leatherette, 1981's Nightclubbing and 1982's Living My Life). Then the three albums in the mid-to-late 80s (1985's Slave to the Rhythm, 1986's Inside Story and 1989's Bulletproof Heart) were the last of her full-length recordings until her welcome return this year on Hurricane.

Like her two disco LPs that proceeded it, Side A of Muse is a seamless set of 4 songs devoted to one theme. This time, Grace devoted the first side to a 20 minute journey from sin to redemption, all set to a pulsating disco beat (the song titles are Sinning, Suffer, Repentance and Saved). Side B, on the other hand, consists of an uptempo love songs (I'll Find My Way To You), a song showing her playing a role as cold-hearted woman (Don't Mess With the Messer), a song of excess and greed typical of the indulgent 70s (Atlantic City Gambler), and a final track devoted to sex (the naughty-titled On Your Knees).

So FINALLY I have all of her original albums on CD, official or otherwise. Sure, when you transfer an LP to CD, there are some crackles of a needle on vinyl. It's not a perfect meshing of old technology with new technology. But so what? I'm just grateful I can do this.

Being a completist in terms of recording artists that I love, it's just groovy to know that I can now officially listen to her full discography whenever I like, without necessarily having to pull out the whole turntable again.

Oh, and 6 months later, I bought my Blu-Ray player.

John Lennon: The Life by Philip Norman (2008)

2008-12-14T20:36:00.004-05:00

He was a rock star, a poet, an actor and a peace activist. He was also a husband, a father, a friend, and an idol to millions. John Lennon accomplished all of this in 40 short years, before an assassin's bullet ended his life and left a world grieving for the loss of a true artist.

Although not a Beatlemaniac in the strictest sense of the words, I do enjoy the music of the Beatles, as well as John Lennon's solo word. I am, however, a big fan of the art and music of Yoko Ono (I'll give you a minute to toss me virtual daggers with your eyes). I even joked (JOKED, mind you), that Yoko was the best thing that ever happened to the Beatles (again, JUST A JOKE, DAMNIT!)

I am also a big biography buff, so I was really excited with the publication of Philip Norman's book John Lennon: The Life...until I saw the thickness of it. The book totals a massive 817 pages (without acknowledgements and index). After thinking, "How in the world am I ever going to finishing reading this?" I picked it up and started reading.

My least favorite section of a biography is the section on the subject's childhood. Though sometimes fascinating, I often find it a bore, especially the common practice of including the subject's genealogy back to the era of the caveman. My true interest lies in the subject of the biography itself, as opposed to his/her grandparents, great-grandparents, great-great grandparents, infinity. So after 70 pages of picking the book up and putting it down, I wondered how I would ever be able to get to the truly interesting parts of Lennon's life as an artist, the true meat of the book?

So it took me a whole week to muster enough concentration to read the first 70 pages. Then I read the remaining 700+ pages in four days flat. I simply could not put the book down.

Philip Norman is an excellent authority on both John Lennon and the Beatles, having authored Shout! The Beatles in Their Generation (which many consider to be the definite book on the Beatles).

The book was simply great. It covered in detail Lennon's career as an artist, first with the Beatles, then as a solo artist. The book also does not shy away for showing both the good and the bad aspects of Lennon's personality---from slapping his first wife Cynthia, to neglecting his son Julian, to the emotionally brutal way he dumped Cynthia for avant garde artist Yoko Ono.

After giving her blessing, Yoko Ono withdrew her support for this book after she read a draft and felt that it was "mean to John." Aside from the somewhat shocking revelation that Lennon may have indirectly been involved in the death of his friend Stu (he brutally fought Stu, who died a few weeks later), I really didn't read any details shocking enough to be categorized as "mean to John." On the contrary, it actually portrayed hims as a truly rounded human being, with stuff to love and stuff to despise about him.

The book concludes with a a postscript titled "Sean Remembers," in which John and Yoko's Sean Lennon talks about life with and without his father, and he also talks about sharing his own mourning of loss a father with the world's mourning of losing an icon. I believe this is one of the few times in his life that Sean spoke openly about his father, and it's quite touching.

In summary, John Lennon: The Life was a fascinating biography that was a pleasure to read...after the first 70 pages.

ABBA: The Movie (1977)

2008-12-14T19:40:00.010-05:00

"WE WANT ABBA! WE WANT ABBA!"

ABBA: The Movie, which I recently upgraded to Blu-Ray for my collection, is a 1977 film that chronicles the Australian leg of ABBA's 1977 world tour. It was directed by Lasse Hallström, who directed almost all of ABBA's promotional clips, which were essentially the first movie videos (not only did they introduce the group to a worldwide audience, but it also allowed ABBA to focus on recording rather than touring). Hallström later went on to direct such flicks as My Life As A Dog, Chocolat, What's Eating Gilbert Grape? and The Cider House Rules.

Nowhere was ABBA Mania more prevalent in 1977 than Australia. Their planned two0week concert tour of the continent made national headlines and led to ABBA merchandising fever, where everything from ABBA socks and ABBA soap to ABBA t-shirts and ABBA bubblegum cards flooded the market for swag hungry ABBA maniacs.

Serving primarily as a document of Ani-Frid, Benny, Bjorn and Agnetha (AKA ABBA) on tour in Australia, director Hallström also strung together a loose fictional storyline of country music DJ Ashley Wallace (Robert Hughes), who is assigned to get an one-on-one exclusive interview with the group for an upcoming radio documentary on the band's visit to Australia. The feat proves to be a quest on the same keel as obtaining the Holy Grail. He travels by plane and follows ABBA on tour from city to city in Australia, but security as well as other ABBA hungry reporters always prevent him from getting the highly coveted interview. He turns up at several of the band's photo ops and repeatedly invites them for a drink or dinner so he can have a one-on-one interview with them in peace. (An interesting note is that, during filming, all four members of ABBA were unaware that Hughes was an actor in the film; they simply thought of him as a persistent and annoying journalist). In the meantime, he interviews people on the street on why they love ABBA--the answer heard over and over again is because they are "clean and tidy."

As he reads about the band in various fan magazines and listens to their music, he becomes a die-hard ABBA fan himself; in one of the film's weirdest scenes, he actually dreams that he is best friends with all four band members, who hang on to his every word (Benny doesn't even seem to mind when he repeatedly kisses Frida). After promises from the band's manager and numerous failed attempts to get near the band, he coincidentally meets the band in an elevator just as they are leaving Australia for Sweden, and he gets the in-depth interview with ABBA.

Or, if you choose, completely ignore the silly story line (even fast forward those parts) and enjoy the concert footage, which is the prime reason for seeing the movie anyway.

The highlight of the film, however, is the incredible performance footage of ABBA in concert. They seem to be having a great time performing on stage to an appreciative audience of people of all ages, from 5 to 85. All the great songs are here---including Dancing Queen, SOS, Mamma Mia, Fernando and more favorites packed into their nightly two-hour performance. The performance footage of their very first concert took place in a rainstorm, with 20,000 enthusiastic ABBA fans in slickers holding umbrellas.

With the exception of touring tribute bands like the excellent Bjorn Again, ABBA: The Movie is one of the few ways to experience an ABBA concert. The supergroup always felt more at home in the recording studio and really didn't consider themselves a touring band. As a matter of the fact, their following tour in 1979 to promote Voulez-Vouz was their last major concert tour as a group (and their only tour that brought them to the United States).

The film also includes scenes from The Girl With The Golden Hair, a 25 minute mini-musical that concluded each concert (and concludes 1978's ABBA:The Album, which coincided with the release of ABBA: The Movie). It's a simple story of a girl (played by both Agnetha and Frida) who dreams of being a singer, but regrets her decision when the realities of being a star come into play. Yes it's a simple story, but precursors what was to come for Benny and Bjorn as composers of the future musicals Chess and the worldwide phenomenon Mamma Mia! The true gen of the mini-musical is a still-unreleased song called Get On The Carousel, a high energy number where Frida and Agnetha (in matching wigs and outfits) want to get off the carousel of fame. Luckily, a dear friend of mine from England (whom I met on the now defunct message boards of the ABBA web site) edited together a kick-ass audio version of the song that is presently in heavy rotation on my IPOD.

The second song of The Girl With The Golden Hair is a track titled I'm a Marionette. I have to admit the faster, more rocky concert version is far superior to the studio track released a year later on ABBA: The Album. One again, thanks to my buddy Andrew from England, I have a live version of that song on CD as well.

The Blu-Ray version of ABBA: The Movie features a few groovy special features that were absent from the standard DVD release (though all were included in a limited edition DVD of the film released in the UK). They include a 40 minute interview with director Lasse Hallström and former ABBA members and songwriters Benny Andersson and Bjorn Ulvaeus (in Swedish, their native tongue, with optional subtitles), two television commercials for ABBA:The Album, and the film's three minute theatrical trailer. My only complain is that these special features were prevented in something I refer to as ABBA Vision, only playable on a small box on the screen without the option of a full screen presentation. This was slightly annoying, but I found the features to be groovy nonetheless. Also included are a gallery of ABBA memorabilia from 1977, as well an an interactive replica of the souvenir book from the 1977 tour.

I could take or leave the story that connects the live performances in ABBA: The Movie, but I thought the movie awesomely captured a time caspule's worth of everything ABBA. Plus the movie is really fun, especially for an ABBA fan like myself.

A Miser Brothers' Christmas (2008)

2008-12-13T23:32:00.003-05:00

Though their original appearance lasted for 10 minutes tops, the 1974 Rankin-Bass stop-motion animation classic The Year Without A Santa Claus is primarily remembered and loved for the appearance of the Miser Brothers, Heat Miser and Snow Miser. Their catchy song, the parade of Mini-Mes that look exactly like them, and their icy and hot tempered banter between the two weather elitists made a visit with the Miser Brothers a must at every Christmas. Now just in time for the holidays, ABC Family’s annual Twenty-Five Days of Christmas has premiered a new holiday special starring the beloved Miser Brothers in their very own holiday movie.

A Miser Brothers’ Christmas marks the return of two voices of the original classic reprising their roles—the legendary Mickey Rooney as Santa Claus and George S, Irving as Heat Miser. Joining the vocal cast of the new special is Juan Chioran as Snow Miser and Catherine Disher as Mrs. Claus, replacing the late, great Shirley Booth. Her look in this special has also changed; Mrs. Claus has had a makeover by means of gastric bypass surgery and Botox.

I was a little apprehensive about the special for a couple of reasons:

First and foremost, there was the disastrous live-action remake of The Year Without A Santa Claus in 2006; it features John Goodman as Santa Claus, the surprisingly-rude-in-real-life (another story for another time) Harvey Fierstein as Heat Miser and Michael McKean as Snow Miser. Though it didn’t obliterate the magic and memory of the original, it came as close it could to annihilate it.

Secondly, Entertainment Weekly (which I subscribe to and religiously read cover-to-cover every Friday) only gave the new special a C-.

But I have to disagree with EW (normally sacrilege) because I found the A Miser Brother’s Christmas to be very enjoyable. It was jolly, festive, funny and an overall surprise delight.

It’s Christmastime once again in the North Pole. Santa Claus is preparing to test drive his new high tech sleigh created by his chief elf (and the youngest chief elf ever) Tinsel. When Santa hits enough turbulence to make him fall from the sky and severely injure his back, potentially ruining Christmas again, the eyes of blame focus on the eternally feuding Miser Brothers. Their mother, Mother Nature, punishes them by both putting them in charge of Christmas this year and forcing them to work at Santa’s workshop at the North Pole. It’s an expected disaster, with Snow Miser’s Mini Mes making “cool toys” of ice and Heat Miser’s Mini Mes making “hot toys” of fire—bickering all the way with their trademark banter that we all know and love.

It’s at this point where the heat Miser/Snow Miser songs delightfully come back into play, and it’s an awesome scene.

When Mrs. Claus learns of the reduction in output, she shows the brothers how they are both on Santa’s naughty list. And in a hysterical flashback of the Miser brothers as babies, the two feuding polar opposites learn, to their surprise, that they really love each other and, now, are determined to deliver the presents for Santa on Christmas Eve.

Disaster hits, however, when everyone realizes that the Miser brothers were not responsible for Santa’s accident at all. It was their Goody-Two-Shoes Momma’s Boy brother the North Wind (who is purple, evil, and comes with his own pair of Mini Mes). Will they be able to save Christmas in time?

This movie is a hoot. And it looks fantastic. Broadcasted in HD, it actually maintains the feel and look of the original stop-motion animation classics of Rankin-Bass with a barely-noticeable computer animation kick. The look of the computer generated characters and props and sets are beautifully textured.

Trust me, no one was more surprised than me that I ended up really enjoying A Miser Brothers’ Christmas. It was absolutely great. I love EW, but C-? My ass. I'd give it an A, thank you very much.

I hope it gets released on Blu-Ray for the 2009 Holiday Season!

Remember The Night (1940)

2008-12-13T23:16:00.005-05:00

Remember the Night can best be described as the best Christmas movie you’ve never seen. Long out-of-print on VHS and never released on DVD, this classic 1940 was first revived for modern audience two years ago on Turner Classic Movies and has been aired annually on the cable network every Christmas since.

I first became aware of Remember the Night through another blog I do—Scranton and Wilkes-Barre in Entertainment—which documents those brief and fleeting but nonetheless memorable surprise references to the cities of Wilkes-Barre or Scranton, PA in movies, books, magazines, TV shows, etc. The wonderful part about the blog is the contributions made by entertainment fans in the area (and, surprisingly, around the country) who are just as intrigued with this local slant on entertainment as I am. One particular person, Don McKeon, let me know about a reference to Scranton in Remember the Night and strongly encouraged me to see the film, confident I would really enjoy it as much as he did.

Last year, I requested the VHS of Remember the Night through Interlibrary Loan (ILL, to librarians in the know) from my employer, Albright Memorial Library. I was initially motivated to view the film solely for the Scranton reference towards the end, but I so thoroughly enjoyed the performances and the story that I was pulled it and didn’t let go until The End, literally. I remember thinking, “This movie was great, why haven’t I ever heard of it?”

The film begins with Lee Leander (the always great Barbara Stanwyck) shoplifting an expensive bracelet from an upscale department store and being subsequently arrested when she tries to pawn it for some quick cash. However, this is her third shoplifting offense and will surely be doing some time for her most recent crime.

The NYC court is about to break for Christmas and, being that it is very difficult to get a conviction around Christmastime, prosecuting attorney John Sargent (Fred MacMurray, in his first of his four screen pairings with Stanwyck, the most famous being Billy Wilder’s 1944 film noir classic Double Indemnity) succeeds in getting the trial postponed until after the holidays.

Feeling bad that Lee will have to spend the holidays in jail, Sargent pulls some strings and arranges bail for her. However, Lee unexpectedly turns up at his doorstep, with nowhere to go and nowhere to turn to. After a night of dinner and dancing, he learns to his delight that Lee is also a native of “the Hoosier state,” and, being that he’s driving to Indiana anyway to visit his family for Christmas, he offers to give Lee a ride as well.

The beginning part of the journey is anything but easy—and it’s a little slapsticky, but still quite funny and enjoyable. After getting lost several times, Lee and John end up crashing through a fence onto a farm. Unhurt, they spend the night in the car awakened by a cow sticking its head in their car (eventually eating Lee’s only hat), and being placed under citizens’ arrest by the proprietor of the farm the crashed into for trespassing and destruction of property. With some fake name (and a little harmless arson), Lee and John manage to escape and continue on their journey.

When he drops Lee off at her mother’s house, she is less than happy to see her and, instead, insults her and tells her she is unwelcome and should never have came. Feeling bad, John comforts a distraught Lee and agrees to have her stay at his family farm for the Christmas holiday, and she is elated.

Finally , the pair arrive at the farm presided over by John’s widowed mother (Beulah Bondi), his beloved aunt (Elizabeth Patterson) and his cousin Willy (Sterling Holloway), who all welcome Lee with open arms and open hearts. They spend an old fashioned Christmas together, complete with piano playing (both Lee and John know how to play), gifts (even a few for unexpected guess Lee), and a new year’s Eve hootenanny, where Lee and John kiss at the stroke of midnight. Over the course of their trip, the pair has unexpectedly fallen in love, a fact that doesn’t suit well with John’s mother. Although she thinks the world of Lee, Mrs. Sargent kindly explains to Lee that John has worked long and hard to attain his present position as an attorney, and his involvement with a woman with a criminal record (particularly one he is assigned to prosecute upon their return to New York), would be career suicide. Though the facts are hard to take, Lee understands and promises Mrs. Sargent she will not let their relationship progress further.

Returning to New York City via Canada (instead of “by way of Scranton or Pittsburgh”), the pair stop at the romantic Niagara Falls, where John tells Lee he truly loves her and can’t go through with the case. He even suggests to her that she skip bail and they remain in Canada together. But, to John’s dismay, Lee will have none of this; she refuses to even consider being the cause of destroying John’s career.

Back in court in New York, Lee takes the stand in her defense (the far-fetched shoplifting under hypnosis alibi), where John simply refuses to have her incriminate herself. It is then that Lee admits her guilt to the court and states she is willing to accept the consequences for her crimes. Sentencing is scheduled, with John reaffirming his love for Lee by promising not to abandon her and ensuring her he will be waiting for her upon her release. Even with my second viewing, I must admit I got a little teary-eyed and a little verklempt during the final scene.

I’m glad that Remember the Night has become a an annual yuletide tradition to moviegoers that are all “It’s A Wonderful Lifed” out and the jaded viewers that wish that, just once, Rudolph would crash the sleigh or the Misfit Toys would actually be disguised cannibals that eat Santa Claus like Christmas goose. And for this, I will be eternally grateful to TCM.

Remember the Night will be airing two more times on TCM—Christmas Eve at 11:15 PM and Christmas morning at 6:15 AM—and I strongly encourage both moviegoers and holiday lovers alike to check out this rare classic Christmas treat. Here's to a future DVD release...FINALLY! And be quick about it--there's only so much Christmas spirit I can spare this close to the holidays!

The Beatles: 1962-1966 (The Red Album) and 1967-1970 (The Blue Album)

2008-12-13T15:43:00.004-05:00

As I am finishing up Philip Norman's recent 817 page biography of John Lennon (titled John Lennon: The Life), I decided to pop in both two disc sets of Beatles hits.

The music speaks for itself. No further comment is needed beyond that.

The Notorious Bettie Page (2005)

2008-12-12T23:16:00.012-05:00

Tonight I decided to forgo viewing yet-another-still-unwatched Blu-Ray in favor of another film in my collection, The Notorious Bettie Page. Aside from being one of my favorite films of all time, it was my own little private tribute to Miss Page, who passed away yesterday at age 85 as a result of a heart attack.

It was the first time I've seen the film in some time. I originally saw it with my brother at the now-defunct Pocono Cinema & Coffee Shop in East Stroudsburg, the only theatre in the Northeast PA to screen the film (as far as I know, at least). I also purchased the sole copy of the DVD available at Best Buy on the day of its video release in September 2006. This was also the first time since I saw it in the cinema that I enjoyed the flick in beautiful widescreen, courtesy of my HDTV and an anamorphic transfer. I should also note that the film was shot in gorgeous black and white, to bring the viewer back to the fifties, with brief sequences in almost unrealistic color (mostly during Bettie's stays in Miami), which made it a really good looking movie...striking, actually.

Before Playboy, there was Bettie Page. In the early to mid 1950s, Bettie Page was known as the Pin-Up Queen of the Universe, but she is just as much recognized today in the new millennium. Her look is cool and very unmistakable--the dark hair with her trademark bangs, the beautiful eyes that make you truly believe she's looking at you and only you, and that famous smile. She will remain eternally beautiful...an absolute knockout.

The Notorious Bettie Page was directed by Mary Harron, whose previous films include the brilliant I Shot Andy Warhol and American Psycho. I had the privilege of meeting the incredibly talented Miss Harron back in 1996 at a screening of I Shot Any Warhol here in Wilkes-Barre, as part of a film series created by my brother called Cafe Cinema.

The movie encompasses the years 1936 (Bettie's teenage years) through 1955 (the Senate hearings on "Smut"). Told in flashbacks; but not in the traditional sense, but the film is bookended by scenes of Bettie waiting to testify in the Senate hearings.

The film stars Gretchen Mol as Bettie Page, and she is absolutely brilliant in the role--her physical resemblance to the real Bettie Page (especially when she smiles) is astonishingly authentic, and her portrayal of Bettie Page is multifaceted and quite fully developed. She also completely personifies her role as the Nashville girl from a religious and conservative family who, after a traumatic early life (including sexual abuse by her father, physical abuse by her first husband, and a sickening gang rape by a group of young men--mercifully this is strongly implied and wisely not shown onscreen), moves to New York City to start a new life.

Though she studied in Tennessee to be a teacher, she quickly realized she hated teaching and wanted something more. She takes odd jobs as a typist, a seamstress (she makes all of her own clothes as well), a beauty pageant contestant (where she wins second prize, a set of pots), and she takes acting classes and goes on auditions, without much success except from producers, whose offer to "help her" via sexual favors are dutifully rejected by the moralistic Bettie.

Walking on the shore, she is asked by an off-duty police officer and part-time photographer if he could take her picture. She soon becomes his model for cheesecake photographs, and he even gives her suggestions for improving her look--including stuffing her bra "underneath" and creating her trademark bangs. her reputation as a reliable model leads her to more photo sessions with a variety of specialty photographers--in lingerie and in the nude (back only, for being photographed in the nude from the front in the 1950s could lead to prosecution).

Her modelling assignments lead her to the photo shop and studio of brother and sister Irving and Paula Klaws, played by Chris Bauer and the amazing Lili Taylor (who previously starred in her Oscar worthy performance as Valerie Solanas in Harron's first film I Shot Andy Warhol). In addition to selling photos of movie stars, the brother and sister photographer team also cater to clients interested in specialty and unique photos and short films of women in boots and other fetish wear, as well as bondage (very underground in the conservative 1950s). Seeing this challenge as merely play acting and fun, and knowing that both Irving and Paula are true professionals, she sees no harm in posing for these new types of photographs and, as she says, "helping people." These photo sessions turn Bettie Page into an underground sensation with a large (and curious) fan base. Despite what she wears or who she's whipping, she always appears cheerful and professional. Her modelling sessions continue in sunny Miami with renown photographer Bunny Yeager (Sarah Paulson) taking beautiful nude shots of Bettie for postcards and the popular nudist magazines.

Even with a ball gag in her mouth, Bettie remains a moral Christian woman. She doesn't smoke, she doesn't drink, she chastises those who swear in her presence, and she attends church regularly. She's also always a lady, polite and soft spoken, as was expected of women in the 1950s. When asked how she justifies her work as a cheesecake and bondage/fetish model, her response is, "Well, Adam and Eve were naked in the Garden of Eden, weren't they?" She views the photo shoots as acting and "Dress-up" and completely harmless--and if she's able to "help people" who view her photos, all the better. When asked by a collector (Jared Harris) what she thinks Jesus would say about what she is doing, she prophetically responds, "I hope that if he's unhappy with that I'm doing, he'll let me know somehow."

Following the Senate hearings, where she overhears a father describe how his son, inspired by her very own photos, killed himself in an unnatural way, Bettie feels confused and guilty regarding her photos. One night wading in the water by moonlight. changes everything. She sees a cross of white light in the sky, which leads her to a church holding a mass. Inspired by the priest's sermon of it never being too late for a sinner to "surrender your life to Christ," she forsakes her word and devotes herself to Jesus Christ.

The two final scenes in the film are quite striking. The first features the first (and only) purely natural color sequence in the entire film. Bettie Page is in a park reading from the Bible and distributing religious literature to interested passers-by. A man asks her is she is Bettie Page. When she tells him she indeed is Bettie Page, he asks her if she is ashamed of her past as a model. Her response begins with her usual "Adam and Eve were naked in the Garden of Eden." BUT then she adds, "When they sinned, they put on clothes."

The very last scene in the film returns to black and white where, at the insistence of the Senate and her brother Irving, Paula Klaw is destroying the photo negatives and film reels featuring Bettie Page in bondage and fetish acts. However she destroys some...then pockets some. Had it not been for Paula's decision not to destroy all of their collection, a substantial portion of Bettie Page's film and pictorial work would have been lost to time. Today, many of these films are available through Something Weird Video, a video company that specializes in unique films from that era.

I loved The Notorious Bettie Page. Not only for its fascinating subject, who is as relevant today as she was nearly 60 years ago, but also for its presentation of female sexuality pre-feminism and its depiction of the narrow view of sex in the morally conservative 1950s America.

I also truly appreciated Gretchen Mol's amazing performance as Bettie Page. Her skillful direction by Mary Harron (who also co-wrote the screenplay with indie favorite Guinevere Turner) never turns Page into a victim, despite the hardships and abuse she suffers before moving to New York, but rather as a moral young woman who just happens to be photographed in fetish clothing or even nude. Mol's Page knows who she is and is truly happy with herself, regardless of hoe others tend to see her--whether it be the moral majority or some of her more twisted admirers." Even when she is dismissed after an okay audition for a play, "It's quite a treat to meet the notorious Bettie Page," she remains proud of who she is, even if it is misunderstood by many.

It was also nice to see Lili Taylor and Jared Harris reteamed for a second time in a Mary Harron film (they previously co-starred together as assassin and victim in Harron's I Shot Andy Warhol). Even with a small budget, Harron was also able to entice a strong cast of supporting players, including David Strathairn as the chair of the Senate hearings and the legendary Austin Pendleton (who seems to appear in every single film I see these days) as Page's acting teacher.

The DVD also includes a short bonus clip of the real Bettie Page performing a striptease as a bonus feature.

The Notorious Bettie Page is definitely one of the best films I've ever seen and is always worthy of another screening...and another...and another.

Bettie Page

(1923-2008)

Tropic Thunder (2008)

2008-12-12T17:05:00.006-05:00

I think I found my top candidate for worst movie of 2008. it's called Tropic Thunder, and it's truly a dud. On the other hand, perhaps the reason I disliked it so much is because my expectations for this "comedy" were so high.

Ten years ago when I was in grad school, in between studying and hanging out with friends, I decided to rent There's Something About Mary because everyone (critics and friends alike) said it was the funniest movie in recent memory, and I was one of the 10 people who had not seen the flick in the movie theater. So one night I rented it, and I watched it, and I laughed exactly one time (I can't even remember the scene).

But I do think it is coincidence that both of these "unfunny turkeys" (as least in my eyes--to each his own, as my friend Dave always says) that both There's Something About Mary and Tropic Thunder both starred Ben Stiller, because I liked a lot of the other movies he was in, especially Meet the Parents and Meet the Fockers (which were both truly hysterically funny). And Stiller is also a talented director, as he proved with 1994's Reality Bites.

But it was the hype that did this film in for me. I've read reviews and heard stories from friends how they laughed from beginning to end...I didn't, however.

In short, Tropic Thunder is a rehash of old ideas from three films---The Player meets Platoon meets Make Them Die Slowly--neither of which I particularly liked.

Tropic Thunder begins promising enough--a series of three fake trailers showing the star power of the three "actors" who are now filming the action flick Tropic Thunder. However, the fake trailer thing was done more effectively and more cleverly in last year's brilliant little-seen-in-its-original-theatrical-form Grindhouse. Here, it just seems like an old idea--been there, done that, especially for all those unlucky to have not seen Grindhouse in theaters.

Cut to the actually filming of Tropic Thunder in Vietnam. The fading action star (Ben Stiller), the fart comedy Jim Carrey-esque comedian (Jack Black) and the 5 time Oscar winning thespian who entrenches himself so thoroughly in his character that he changes his skin color to black for the role (Robert Downey, Jr.). All three actors have had varying levels of success on the silver screen , and all have made numerous films---which makes me wonder why they think the scene they are filming has no coverage, no retakes, etc. Weird.

They believe the director being blown to bits in front of their very eyes is a special effects trick, then set off through the jungles of Vietnam, all the while believing they are being filmed for the movie. Even when the fading action stars gets abducted by the Flaming Dragon, a drug cartel with a child as its leader, he thinks it's all part of the plot of Tropic Thunder.

A barely recognizable Tom Cruise as a greedy studio man as well as mugshot hall of famer Nick Nolte as the author of the book Tropic Thunder that is being adapted into a film, round out the cast.

I maybe smiled a couple of times, but the jokes failed 99% of the time. Even the numerous cameos again, done in The Player back in 1992)--from Matthew McConaughey to Tyra Banks to even B-listers like Lance Bass and Jennifer Love-Hewitt--did nothing for me.

Again, maybe it was my high expectations that killed my potential enjoyment of Tropic Thunder, but I hated the movie nonetheless.

Audition (1999)

2008-12-11T22:55:00.006-05:00

I just finished watching Audition, and I must honestly say that this was truly one of the most original and bizarre films I have ever seen.

Audition came with a strong recommendation by my dear friend (and fellow blogger) David Lisa, who also has Audition in his impressive DVD collection. As a matter of fact, I purchased my DVD of Audition when Dave visited me two summers ago---and I'm so glad I did because, as of now, the film is once again out of print on DVD.

The film actually begins quite softly, leaving the viewer completely oblivious to the nightmare that will draw the film to its horrifying conclusion. Seven years after the death of his beloved wife, a middle-aged man named Shigeharu Aoyama is encouraged by his teenage son to start dating again and maybe even marry. Encouraged by his friend, who is a film producer, Shigeharu sets up a series of fake auditions for a fake movie, hoping to meet his new love in this innovative way via a surefire screening process that involves a series of videotaped personal questions.

Even before the audition process begins, one specific girl catches Shigeharu's eye. Her name is Asami, and the essay accompanying her resume intrigues Shigeharu. She describes her passion for ballet, which had to give up after an unfortunate accident.

Near the end of the long audition of 30 would-be mates, Asami appears and impresses Shigeharu even more with her sweetness and beautiful appearance. His director friend, however, is a little more skeptical of Asami and discovers the few reference she provides are of men who have mysteriously gone missing. Shigeharu ignores his buddy's advice and invites Asami to dinner and they begin dating. What he doesn't know is that Asami is sitting by the phone, eyes downturn, waiting for his promised call. Also curious is the large canvas bag sitting in her apartment---and when it unexpectedly moved, I literally jumped 50 feet into the air...it was THAT much of a surprise.

Shigeharu takes Asami away for the weekend and they make passionate love. But in the morning, he discovers she's gone. In his search to find her, he remembers the stories she told him and goes to the places she referenced.

It's here where the man's nightmare begins.

I don't want to give away the ending, but the calmness of the film's first eighty minutes gives way to a horrifying visual nightmare induced by a drugged glass of Scotch. The nightmare reveals Asami's true nature and her experiences as a child that have transformed her into a single Japanese man's worst nightmare...and don't even get me started on the deformed tongueless man in the bag, gleefully lapping up a bowl of Asami's fresh vomit.

Then the film enters its insane final twenty minute sequence of horror. When Shigeharu wakes up from his sleep, Asami is waiting for him---with acupuncture needles, wire that "easily slices through meat and bone," and a syringe aimed towards his tongue.

And I'm sure her "kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty" (translated as "deeper, deeper") is going to give me a nightmare tonight.

Audition is a great example of filmmaking that slowly and suspensefully builds up to a climax that comes out of left field and hits you in the gut. What a ride.

Before Saw, there was Audition!

Erin Brockovich (2000) on Blu-Ray (Import) (2008)

2008-12-11T15:44:00.007-05:00

I decided to upgrade my standard DVD of the 2000 Julia Roberts flick Erin Brockovich to the Blu-Ray format. The only problem is it's not yet available on Blu-Ray in the US (Universal, the American distributor, sided with HD-DVD and released it on that format instead). However, to my delight, I discovered that Sony Pictures (which co-distributed the film with Universal) indeed released the Blu-Ray version of the film for its Asian market and, to my extra delight, there is no region code which means it will play on US Blu-Ray players. granted, as an import, it was a tad more expensive than a American BD, but only slightly more, and I'm so happy I upgraded it because Erin Brockovich is a really great movie (I saw it in the theater twice before my sabbatical from movie theaters--more on than in a future entry).

Based on a true story, Erin Brockovich features megastar Julia Roberts in an absolutely stellar performance as the title character, in a role that won her the Academy Award for Best Actress. Erin is an unemployed and struggling twice-divorced single mother of three. She has no formal education, but she is very intelligent and has an amazing head for numbers and other information. She also speaks her mind, usually peppered with profanity, and dresses in tight skirts and even tighter blouses that maximize the effects of her ample cleavage--seven years after the film's original 2000 release, we would not refer to her character as a MILF.

After losing a lawsuit resulting from a car accident that wasn't her fault, and with a handful of dollars in her bank account and a desperation for a paycheck to support her kids, the determined and feisty Brockovich hits up Ed Masry (played by the always incredible Albert Finney), the lawyer who defended her, for a job in his law firm. Her new colleagues (including Conchata Ferrell , Roberts's co-star in the 1988 film Mystic Pizza) look down upon Erin for her brazen attitude and her skimpy clothing, but Masry gives her the opportunity to research some real estate files she finds intriguing.

The files in question have to do with attempts from a huge corporation, Pacific Gas & Electric, to pruchase the homes of the residents of Hinkley, California, near one of their plants. But what Erin discovers is that PG&E has been knowingly poisoning the groundwater of the smalltown with lethal levels of hexavalent chromium (or chromium 6), which has resulted in illnesses of nearly all of the residents in town--from nosebleed to benign tumors to cancer. Working with Ed, Erin Brockovich goes on a crusade to hold the corporation accountable for the suffering their negligence has brought about to Hinkley. In the process, she is instrumentally responsible for the largest legal settlement in the history of the United States (over 320 million dollars).

Throughout all of this Brockovich is also struggling with a all-encompassing job that for the most part keeps her away from her children for long periods of time. The burden is eased, however, in the form of George, a Harley Davidson biker with a heart of gold (the impressive Aaron Eckhart, who is practically unrecognizable behind Lynyrd Skynyrd hair hair and goatee).

The real Erin Brockovich also has a cameo role as a waitress named Julia.

This is only the second film I've seen by director Steven Soderbergh (the first being 1989's Sex, Lies & Videotape, which I loved when I originally saw in the theater at the tender age of 15). But both films of his that I saw I really, really loved.

The Special Features on the Sony Blu-Ray are scaled down from the original standard American DVD release by Universal. Though we still get a couple of features and over 30 minutes of deleted scenes (all of which are quite good and could have easily fit nicely into the original film, if it were not for the constraints of an already over 2 hour running time). And unlike the Blu-Ray of Baby Mama, I'm glad they kept the deleted scenes. As for the commentary? I can usually take them or leave them, so I'm not going to rail against its non inclusion.

Definitely a worthy upgrade to Blu-Ray. And a truly great film.

Satan Met A Lady (1936)

2008-12-10T21:35:00.005-05:00

What an abysmal piece of shit!

Satan Met a Lady was another film version of The Maltese Falcon, released in 1936--five years after the 1931 original film, and five years before the 1941 definitive Humphrey Bogart classic. Even though I immensely disliked the first adaptation of Dashiell Hammett's classic novel, the 1931 version was Gone With The Wind compared to this atrocity on celluloid.

And I mistakenly believed that every film before 1950 had some aspect of craftsmanship or acting or directing that automatically made it a classic, Sat Met A Lady proved me wrong.

What exactly was wrong with it, you ask? Everything.

But to be specific, it was a loosely (and I use that term loosely, pardon the pun), adapted film version of the novel; in fact, the opening credits state that it was based on a novel by Dashiell Hammett--the operative word being A. And aside from a handful of lines taken directly from the novel and, of course, the basic story line, it bore little resemblance to The Maltese Falcon.

Secondly, the film was a slapstick romantic comedy, as opposed to a tale of crime and greed and good vs. evil. It didn't even qualify as even a parody--just a tragedy--even though the characters are rechristened with names that attempt to parody the original version (e.g. Sam Spade is now Ted Shane). Rather than parody, I believe the characters' names were merely changed to protect the respected...and, to a lesser extent, the innocent.

Thirdly, the coveted object was no longer a jewelled falcon, but a ram's horn that happened to be filled with precious gems. Furthermore, it is never referred to as a ram;s horn by any of the characters, who opt to refer to it as "the trumpet." It's basically a joke with a lousy punchline. Talk about ridiculous.

A horribly miscast Bette Davis stars as Valerie Purvis, who wields a gun as often as she can and flirts her way to the "trumpet." Warren William is a catastrophe as Ted Shane (AKA Sam Spade), a playboy who also happens to be a buffoon, playing the character for laughs. And even Arthur Treacher (from Fish & Chips fame) even shows up as the "Cairo-esque" character Anthony Travers; he is no longer gay, just British. And Alison Skipworth takes the "Kasper Gulman" role (perfected in the 1941 film by Sydney Greenstreet, in his first film role ever, no less) and is renamed Madame Barabbas , a grandmotherly figure who wants the "trumpet" perhaps more than anyone else.

Even without the literary basis, Satan Met A Lady is an unfunny comedy on its home without the literary pedigree.

However, like the 1931 original film version, it is a nice addition to the 3-disc Collector's Edition DVD of The Maltese Falcon just so you can watch it as a bonus feature to see how it warrants zero comparison to the classic 1941 Bogart version.

Satan may have met a lady, but the true hell was getting through the 74 minute running time of this stinker of a flick.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008)

2008-12-09T20:41:00.002-05:00

Even before I watch Star Wars: The Clone War, I was prepared to hate it. I even rehearsed my opening line for this entry, which was going to be "I was not disappointed in the fans' disappointment." It was a box office flop, it was raked over the coals by the critics and die-hard fans of the original trilogy and the recent prequel trilogy. So I was expected to hate it as well. But this turned out not to be the case...not entirely, at least.

I do own the previously released 2-D animated Clone Wars: Volumes 1 and 2 on DVD and, though they got off to a disappointing start, I still tuned it and ended up really enjoying them both. But another Clone Wars project?

First of all, the film is from Warner Bros. So right off the bat, there is no 20th Century Fox logo with the fanfare. There was no John Williams opening theme. There wasn't even a scroll. In addition, the graphics of this animated feature look like a second rate video game without the benefit of a controller (aside from the fast-forward button on my remote). And many would agree that George Lucas had already milked the Star Wars teet to the level of dehydration.

But I didn't use the fast-forward button. I simply came to the realization that this wasn't technically a Star Wars film. It is separate from the Star Wars saga, though it details the Clone Wars that bridge Episodes II and III. It was actually, after all, merely a springboard for the much-hyped Cartoon Network animated series. So with these revelations in mind, I just sat back and enjoyed the show. Though this flick isn't perfect, it was still an enjoyable piece of popcorn entertainment that doesn't entirely deserve the bad rep it got when released in movie theaters this past summer.

Obi-Won and Anakin Skywalker are still Jedi Knights doing battle in the ongoing Clone Wars. Enter young Padawan Ahsoka Tano , a Jedi tween assigned to to a reluctant Skywalker. At first, I thought she was as annoying and whiny as Jar Jar Binks, but I eventually upgraded my opinion to her being on the level of annoyance as Anakin Skywalker in Attack of the Clones...tolerable, but strangle-worthy. The neverending puns, quips, and bad jokes between Skywalker and his young Padawan range from cute to cringe-worthy.

Another plot point of the flick is the kidnapping of Jabba the Hut's son and the attempts of the Jedi to rescue him from the clutches of Count Dooku and his apprentice, the "Britney-like" bald headed and vicious Dark Jedi Asajj Ventress, who was a character I really loved. The Clone Wars got especially interesting whenever this new character was on the screen, and she does indeed earn her own lightsaber duel with Obi-Won. And the character Asajj Ventress is visually the most exciting part of The Clone Wars. And when George Lucas re-edits and rereleases the Star Wars saga for the 127th time, I really do hope he edits some footage of her into it as well.

Call me a traditionalist because I too love the Star Wars movies, but The Clone Wars was still a fun movie to watch...once you lower your expectations and just enjoy the ride without too much overanalyzation. Is it worthy of an actual purchase on Blu-Ray for my collection? I'd say yes...in the future.

The History of the Snowman: From the Ice Age to the Flea Market by Bob Eckstein (2007)

2008-12-09T10:41:00.004-05:00

What a clever idea for a book. Author Bob Eckstein takes the snowman, something we all know and love--or something we are at least all familiar with--and presents his subject in a new light. Thoroughly researched for over five years, this slim volume explores a part of documented history that was curiously went unexplored until now.

The book is written chronologically in reverse, beginning with the snowman in modern times and concluding with evidence of the earliest documented snowman in history. On the surface, this can be seen is simply a clever literary tactic, but my theory is that Eckstein's choice to document in reverse is a metaphor for going back to our own childhoods---before the internet and other technology--when building a snowman was the biggest joy in our lives.

The book is also filled with awesome illustrations--some stand by the text, and others are a series of color plates depicting the snowman though art, historical photographs and advertising.

And you'll be surprised just how varied these depictions are--from the traditional snowman, to artistic rendering of snowmen as angels or even portraying authentic human qualities, to the snowman depicted as a falling-down drunk or a knife-wielding murderer.

I must say that I thoroughly and completely enjoyed reading The History of the Snowman.

The Maltese Falcon (1931)

2008-12-08T21:36:00.009-05:00

If I've learned one thing after viewing the 1931 screen adaptation of The Maltese Falcon, it's that being first doesn't always mean being the best. Sure, some of the dialogue is word-for-word to the latter film, but those who know and love the 1941 Humphrey Bogart/John Huston remake will find it to be a trite, ultra pale imitation of what was to come.

Ricardo Cortez exhibits none of the toughness of Sam Spade that Bogart brilliantly characterized a mere ten years later. Rather Cortez portrays Spade with the mannerisms of a Sunday School teacher, a chipper "man about town" who just happens to be a detective. He's merely a wimp whom the ladies of Hammet's novel (published only a year before) find irresistible.

The strength (if any) of this film lies in the performance of Bebe Daniels, who portrays Ruth Wonderly (her true identity of Brigid O'Shaughnessy is never revealed) with the sexuality and blatant frankness missing from Mary Astor's performance in the definitive 1941 film version.

Being a pre-Code Hollywood film, I was not surprised that some of the overtly sexual elements of Hammett's novel were transferred to the screen, including Bebe Daniels appearing in a nude bathing scene and the strip search scene, a pivotal plot point missing from the 1941 version. However, all traces of Cairo's homosexuality have been completely expunged, which was a real surprise.

Perhaps what I found most repulsive was the unnecessary Epilogue tacked on at the end of the film (probably to appease the centers), where Spade visits Ruth in jail and gets the warden's word of honor that she will be bestowed with "good food, all the cigarettes she wants, and some candy." Geez, talk about pandering. I suppose that Sam Spade really will be waiting for her outside once she finishes serving out her prison sentence.

Though I enjoyed watching it and found it interesting to compare the two film versions, I can also plainly see why the 1931 version did not warrant a stand alone DVD release and has been relegated to a special feature of the one-and-only illustrious 1941 remake that has stood the test of time to be regarded today as the true classic.

Nina Simone: A Single Woman (Expanded Edition) (2008)

2008-12-07T22:07:00.003-05:00

Nina Simone has expressed in countless interviews how she absolutely hated to be compared to Billie Holiday. She always seemed compelled to assure people (whether they've ever heard her music or not) that just because she happened to be a black recording artist did not mean she was a jazz singer. Her choice of material was extremely eclectic and her repertoire did often include some jazz songs, but she was The High Priestess of Soul...not The High Priestess of Jazz.

Only with her final album of original material (and her first since 1985's Nina's Back), 1993's A Single Woman, did Nina Simone come close to making a complete jazz CD--and an obvious comparison to Billie Holiday is evident.

Holiday's last LP before her untimely death was 1958's Lady in Satin, and it was a complete departure from her standard straight-up jazz; she was backed by a full orchestra, courtesy of the legendary Ray Ellis, and her voice was a mere ghost of what it once was, ravaged by heroin and hard living.

Similarly, Dr. Simone's last album of original material, A Single Woman, demonstrates an altogether different sound for The High Priestess of Soul--her trademark piano (she was a classically trained pianist) is sparse in favor of a full backing orchestra. Her voice, though still as strong as ever, demonstrates is fill of life experiences and is richer and deeper, perhaps more fragile and vulnerable, than on previous recordings. And the album is the sole complete CD of her career that comes closest to being a full-on jazz record.

Even before her untimely death in 2003, there was talk of releasing an expanded version of A Single Woman with additional songs she recorded during the album's recording session. Only this year, without even a notice, the expanded version of A Single Woman was released. As soon as I discovered this, I immediately upgraded my copy of ASW with the new version. It includes 7 additional songs of various lengths (the shortest being a mere 55 seconds) after, hearing the new material, I believe the reason they were excised was they didn't fit the overall theme of the CD, which is being alone--choosing to be alone, being left alone after the one you loved has left you in one capacity or another, not wanting to be alone anymore--it's all painfully here.

Let's start with the 10 tracks that comprise Nina Simone's A Single Woman as originally released in 1993:

The title track sets the tone of the entire record. The song A Single Woman hasn't always been alone, but now is; "at home or in a crowd," she's always alone. She's "caught in a world few people understand, I am what I am, only one single woman." The lyrics and her delivery on the vocal feel like a stab through the heart. It's beautiful pain.

Lonesome Cities is slightly more whimsical. Here, she's a traveller on her own through her life, making stops along the way, and she's always looking forward to seeing more.

If I Should Lose You is a song she originally recorded on her Wild is the Wind LP back in 1996. It's so interesting to me to hear her revisit this particular track as a woman of 60, as opposed to the woman of 33 she was in her first recording some 27 years earlier.

Primarily associated with Peggy Lee, The Folks Who Live on a Hill is a personal recording of Nina's that, in a spoken dedication, she sings to the late Prime Minister of Barbados (and her former lover) Earl Barrow, who was married at the time. The song vividly pains a picture of what their life would have been if they were free to spend the rest of their lives together. It's a very moving recording.

Love's Been Good To Me is similar in a sense to Lonesome Cities, in which Nina is a traveller and recalling the past loves of her life. But rather than actively searching for another love, she's content with the warm memories these love affairs has given her.

Papa, Can You Hear Me? may be viewed as the oddest selection. Originally recorded by Barbra Streisand for the film Yentl is turned into a song of mourning by an adult woman grieving the loss of her father decades before.

Fluent in French (she lived in France after her self-imposed exile from the US in the 1970s), she next sings Il N'y A Pas D'Amour Heureux, which is loosely translated as There's No Happy Love. Even though I don't speak a word of French (aside from Bonjour, au revoir, and merde), it's still a beautiful song, peppered with the sound of a Parisian accordion.

Just Say I Love Him made me cry the first time I heard it, and it often still does. Nina is practically begging for a lover to come back to her. I still get teary eyed on occasion when I play the song, though my own experiences with love and sex is that of a heaping steaming pile of shit, but not without its delicious melancholy value.

The More I See You was, at my request, the very first song my brother played when he had a college radio show titled The Jazz Show with JR. It's bouncier than the other tracks, and Nina does a great vocal.

The final song of the originally released 10 tracks is Simone's self-penned Marry Me. The only song on the CD where her piano expertise is featured prominently and the orchestra is minimally evident, Marry Me ends the CD on a high note, with Simone saying she's not given up and is open to sharing her life with someone again.

Now the 7 previously released tracks released here for the first time are quite eclectic. I prefer to view it as an entirely separate collection from the main CD. Gone are the songs of longing for love, past and present, and in its place are the type of songs Nina was famous for recording...except Bob Dylan has now become Paul McCartney and Prince.

First us is what is perhaps the most beautiful cover of The Beatles' The Long and Winding Road I've ever heard. Just fantastic.

I'm Gonna' Sit Right Down and Write Myself A Letter brings in the chords of her previous hit My Baby Just Cares For Me.

Baseball Boogie is a 55 second song penned by Nina Simone herself, a quick song with Nina's voice and Nina's piano.

Bob Marley's No Woman No Cry is extraordinary. A reggae groove mixed a a tinge of gospel on the chorus and Nina's mellow delivery. Great track.

Do I Move You? is another song Nina previously recorded in the late 1960s. It's pure blues. Not my favorite song of Nina's, but it's always cool to hear her revisit a song from her past.

The Times They Are A Changin' is a 56 second revisitation of another song from Nina's past. It is Dylan, but too brief.

The new tracks concludes with Nina's cover of the Prince track Sign 'O' The Times, which is quite an unusual choice, even for Nina. Here Nina raps--about crack and gangs and guns and the ghetto. But, like everything she recorded, Nina Simone makes it work. it's a call to people to wake up and take control of and responsibility for their lives and their decisions.

A Single Woman is perhaps my favorite CD of Dr. Nina Simone's, and I admit I was a little disappointed that she chose not to perform any selections from the CD when I saw her in concert in Philadelphia in June 2000. Any of the tracks would've been magical to hear performed live. But it's an album that stands tall on its own, and one that is also enhanced with some tracks from the recording sessions that have finally seen the light of the day, to the delight of my ears.

The Maltese Falcon (1941)

2008-12-07T19:43:00.009-05:00

Every October my employer, The Lackawanna County Library System, sponsor a citywide reading event called Scranton Reads, in which the residents of Scranton are encouraged to read a selected book, as well as participate in book talks, watch the film version, etc. 2008's selection was The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett, a pulp detective novel that was first serialized in a magazine, then published in book form in 1930. Though I had a old beat-up paperback copy of the novel in my collection for years, I'd never read it simply because I had no motivation to--it just looked really groovy on my bookshelf. So in September (I'm always early, a nasty habit) I did read the entire novel, and I was really surprised how much I enjoyed reading it. It was seedy and lurid and filled with eccentric and repulsive characters, but it was simply an engrossing book.

So I immediately purchased the 3-disc Collector's Edition DVD of the classic film version of the Maltese Falcon, and it basically sat on my shelf unwrapped until a few days ago when I decided to watch it. Always on one side of the fence or the other on the eternal "read the book, see the movie" debate that has been plaguing me most of my adult life, I was told by a friend that the film version was a faithful adaptation of the novel. And surprisingly, it was....to a point.

The directorial debut of legendary filmmaker John Huston, The Maltese Falcon was actually the third filmed version of Hammett's classic novel (1931's The Maltese Falcon with Ricardo Cortez and 1936's Satan Met A Lady starring Bette Davis preceded the definitive 1941 film version) and is the version that is most highly regarded by fans and critics alike.

Humphrey Bogart is detective Sam Spade, the yardstick to which all future detectives in print and in film would be measured against), a jaded and hard-boiled detective who is drawn into a case regarding the hunt of a missing and sought after jewelled falcon, now coated in black enamel that is (as Bogart states in the film's classic filan line of dialogue) "the stuff that dreams are made of".

As I mentioned earlier, the superb 1941 film version is indeed a faithful adaptation of the book, and it seldom deviates from the text. But the Production Code of 1934 was still in effect and was being strongly enforced in 1941. Therefore, the homosexuality of Joel Cairo was significantly toned down for the film version, but is still evident in the fantastic portrayal of the character by the legendary Peter Lorre (whose acting style has launched a thousand impersonations, even famously as a mad scientist in a Bugs Bunny cartoon). Also toned down was the overt sexuality and sexual tension between the characters in the book--particularly with Spade's relationship with the wife of his deceased partner, his "is-it-more-than-flirtation relationship with his secretary Effie, and the sultry and somewhat seedy affair between Spade and femme fatale Brigid O'Shaughnessy (for example, at one point in the book, he orders Brigid to undress in the bathroom while the unsavory searchers of the Maltese Falcon wait outside, all knowing well what's going on behind the door).

Also, though she is very good in the role, Mary Astor's portrayal of Brigid O'Shaughnessy in the film version is rather sweet and innocent and rather pure (completely the opposite of what I pictured in my head as I read the novel). She shows her true colors towards the film's climax but, for some reason, Astor's portrayal of purity and sweetness didn't consistently work for me, but she still gave a fine performance.

Also of interesting note is the fact that Bogart, Lorre, and (in his film debut) Sidney Greenstreet (as mobster Kasper Gutman, who covets the falcon more than any other character in the film), would again appear together in the same film a year later in 1942's Casablanca--although (sadly), the three do do share the screen together at the same time. Here, they play off each other brilliantly.

A particularly awesome Special Feature on the DVD is the Warner Night at the Movies 1941 feature, which gives viewers the option of watching the film preceded by a collection of trailers, vintage newsreels, Warner shorts, and 2 Warner Bros. cartoons. Watching the disc in this mode recreatesthe complete experience of seeing a motion picture in the movie theater in the 1940s, but in the comfort of your own home.

Loved the book, loved the movie...equally. Very rare, but very groovy in those rare instances when it happens.

Winter of the Witch (1969)

2008-12-05T23:06:00.011-05:00

Can a movie that you saw in over and over in grade school during library time actually inspire someone to become a librarian?

Let me explain about how I came to love a short film from the 1970s titled Winter of the Witch and, in the process, also explain the picture of the pancakes featured so prominently in this blog entry:

Before the internet, before the overhead projector, even before the now-nearly-defunct VCRs, the public school system's brilliant idea of combining education with entertainment consisted of filmstrips (that beeped when each frame advanced, thanks to a cassette recorder embedded in the contraption) and the 16mm film projector. And nowhere were these wonders of technology more frequently put to use than my favorite class of the week--LIBRARY TIME!

As a elementary school student (int he late 70s and early 80s), I remember that we always got a treat of a short movie (though without the joys of popcorn and a cold refreshment) before we got to select our books from the library shelves (shelves that I vividly remember were even shorter than us students. And every year in every grade at around Halloween time (which, even in adulthood, remains my very favorite time of the year) we would watch this movie about a witch who lived in an attic that made magical pancakes that made people see colored spots and make them happy--only in my late teens did I remember the title of the film as Winter of the Witch. And I looked forward to this movie every year (sometimes they showed it twice during Library Time in October).

Cut to my late teens. My brother and I taped four large white poster boards together and borrowed a film projector 16mm films from the Osterhout Free Library (via the State Library of Pennsylvania) in Wilkes-Barre to watch classic flicks on the big screen in our homemade home theater. Practicality every weekend for about a year, my brother and I made this a weekly ritual. And on this homemade big screen, we watched Annie Hall, Casablanca, West Side Story...and Winter of the Witch, which the Osterhout had (a pristine 16mm copy, by the way) in their collection.

But aside from avid film collectors, 16mm films and the soothing sound of the running projector have vanished...and so had Winter of the Witch, or so I thought.

The film was released in a VHS format to schools as well but, regardless of the hours and hours spend on the internet, my brother and I were unable to secure a copy.

Eventually, I discovered Just For The Hell of It, a video dealer of rare and specialty films not officially available on DVD. And to my astonishment, their catalog included Winter of the Witch, the Holy Grail of my joyous childhood memories--SEE?

So I purchased a copy. Don't get me wrong, it was well worth the $20 but, to be honest, the print used for the DVD-R left a lot to be desired. it was taken right from the 16mm film, with an abundance of splices and lost audio. But I was (and am) still grateful to have a copy of this thought-to-be-lost film classic in my collection.

Then came YouTube. With the exception of the first 5 minutes of the film, YouTube has made Winter of the Witch available online---FOR FREE! Isn't that simply delicious? The 70s meets the new millennium--I LOVE IT!

And watching Winter of the Witch as an adult, I can fully appreciate the LSD overtones I missed as an innocent child.

The first shot of the film is a really hideous looking painting being removed from a wall by a Barbara Parkins knock-off. According to the narrator, she and her son (the film never mentions what happened to the husband/father) are leaving the hustle and bustle of the city for the country. By sheer luck, they manage to purchase a huge estate for $500. However, what the real estate dealer doesn't tell them is that the house is haunted.

But they fund out soon enough. A 300 year-old red-headed witch (played by the stage and screen legend Hermione Gingold) insists that the house is hers. The mother compromises and agrees to let the witch stay in the attic, where she listens to the "I'm Unhappy, You're Unhappy" song over and over and over again on her Victrola.

Soon enough, the boy and the witch become fast friends. He learns that the witch, who used to be a cook for the group of witches that used to occupy his new house, is unhappy because she feels so useless in the "modern" world, which is so scary as it is that it doesn't need witches. Suddenly, it dawns on her that what the world needs is blueberry "happiness" pancakes. So in her big, black pot, she mixes up a batch of pancakes. After seeing LSD-esque spots, anyone who eats the pancakes becomes obscenely happy. The mother decides to open a "pancake parlor" in her redecorated house and make the world happy...one pancake at a time. And in the end, the witch is the happiest of all--because now that's everyone's happy, she can start scaring them again.

The end.

Now this may sound simple and stupid but, as a sex-year old, this film was Citizen Kane to me. And, to this day, Winter of the Witch remains one of my favorite films of all time.

So whoever owns the rights, I plea with you on behalf of the millions of children of the 70s and 80s: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE put out an official DVD of Winter of the Witch. You'll make a mint.

And if you say no, just watch it on Google Videos head on over to Just For The Hell of It and buy yourself a copy.

So did Winter of the Witch inspire me to become a librarian? If it did, I was obviously trippin' from the pancakes...he he.

My Boring-Ass Life: The Uncomfortably Candid Diary of Kevin Smith (2007)

2008-12-04T22:19:00.003-05:00

During my convalescence yesterday, I finished reading Kevin Smith's 2007 book My Boring Ass Life. The book can basically be described as a series of blog entries Smith made on his website from 2005 to 2007. But it's so much more than that.

Smith seems to make even the more mundane things he does every single day interesting. Yes, he began each day with a shower and a shit (kinda like me yesterday), then plays online poker (and sometimes gambles in casinos), and plays games and watches flicks with his daughter. He usually eats at Griddle for breakfast with his family, watches a lot of DVDs, and a typical day usually ends with Tivoed something (usually The Simpsons) and a little sex with his wife Jen (or "popping one off" to pictures of Jen).

But other things happen in his life besides the mundane. He gets an acting gig in the Jennifer Garner flick Catch and Release; he writes, directs , edits, stars in, and releases Clerks II (which got an eight-minute standing ovation at Cannes); he copes with the second anniversary of the death of his father; he experiences B.W. time (Bruce Willis time) when he scores a small role in Live Free or Die Hard; he suffers a painful anal fissure while serving on jury duty; and he struggles with his weight and tries unsuccessfully to quit smoking.

His diary also demonstrates, without a doubt, that Kevin Smith is also a loving husband, a devoted father to his daughter Harley, a best friend to everyone he meets (especially his buddy Jason Mewes, who journeys to hell and back again with his drug addiction and, ultimately, his sobriety), and a dedicated filmmaker coping with skeptical audiences and oft overtly harsh critics.

Above all, Kevin Smith is appreciative of and grateful for his loyal fans. From signing thousands of items to sell at his comic stores (Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash), to four-hour college chats in the US and abroad, to conducting 12 to 14 hour autograph sessions for his fans with a smile, he shows over and over again that he does not take his audience for granted, which is believed to be quite rare in the movie business.

And he accomplishes all of this and more with his trademark sense of humor, which never fails to keep me chuckling.

Smith is a master storyteller, and I enjoyed this book just as much (if not more) than his previous book of essays (Silent Bob Speaks). Many of the stories Smith relates in My Boring Ass Life have been told in the DVD Sold Out: A Threevening with Kevin Smith, but it's very interesting and quite entertaining to read these stories in print.

Candid, frank, always engaging, and very, VERY funny, My Boring Ass Life is anything but. I only wish my life could be half as boring as Kevin Smith's.

Britney Spears: Circus (Deluxe Edition) (2008)

2008-12-04T20:39:00.008-05:00

I enjoy Britney Spears.

There. I admit it.

Call it balls. Call me crazy. Insult my manhood.

Or better yet, go watch some NASCAR while making love to a close relative (you know who you are).

Why do I enjoy Britney Spears? Well, there are three reasons.

Reason #1. I'm a pop culture Fanatic. I watch E! news every night, followed by Chelsea Lately; I look forward to my copy of Entertainment Weekly every Friday, thanks to the US Mail; and I get a steamin' cup of Chat Stew ("SO Meaty") every Friday night @10 by the Soup with Joel McHale ("Chicks, Man!") So I've followed Britney through, the shaved head, the stint in rehab, her disasterous performance at the 2007 MTV VMAs (which really wasn't that horrible, if you ask me), the custody battle, and the affair with the starfucker paparazzo (which I've only recently learned is Italian for mosquito--fitting).

Reason #2. I love a good comeback. I watched the documentary on MTV last Sunday. Aside from seeing firsthand (vicariously, of course), how intrusive the paparazzi can be, I came to the conclusion Britney Spears works best when she is being told what to do...and there's nothing wrong with that. It's the story of my own life, actually.

Reason#3. I was actually a mere 15 feet away from Miss Spears a few years back. Let me explain. In 2001, my friend and colleague Michele and I went to see Madonna in Philadelphia. Long story on how we got the tickets--awesome seats next to the stage, by the way--but it involved Michele's friendship with a guitarist who was friends with Madonna's guitarist, Monte Pittman, who was responsible for the groovy seats. We also had VIP passes for backstage after the concert to visit Monte, who was a nice, groovy guy (no, we didn't meet Madonna). After signing our tour books, he asked us, "Did you see Britney Spears?" Being I was backstage with a guitarist for the biggest star in the world, I responded all cool (or so I thought)with, "Ewww, no. Why?" Monte's answer shocked the shit out of me: "Because she was sitting one section away from you guys." At that moment, I learned to just own up and admit that I don't entirely hate somebody just because uncool-people-who-think-they're-the epitome-of-cool people think I should. Fuck them.

Now on to Circus. Quite enjoyable. Very enjoyable, in fact. I loved it. THERE, I SAID IT, OKAY? Yes, the lyrics are very surface and not really what you'd consider deep, but it's pop music. What do you want? And her voice is thin. Again, so what? Despite everything seemingly working against her, the songs still sound great. Maybe it's fluff, but it's good-sounding fluff. And fluff is always comfortable, isn't it?

Circus starts out of the gate with a bang with her recent #1 hit Womanizer (only her second #1 in 10 years). Admit it, even if you hate the song, you can't get the chorus out of your head. Almost like a sequel to her hit Toxic. Great track.

Then the title track, Circus, which is also quite catchy and is wisely being marketed as her follow-up to Womanizer..

Next is the first of the only two ballads on the entire CD. Out From Under is nothing new, but it's still a beautiful-sounding track. The second, My Baby (which concludes the CD) is about her love for her two sons. You saw it on E!, now hear it straight from the primary source.

The other songs are poppy and bouncy. Kill the Lights, Shattered Glass, Blur, MMM Papi, Mannequin, and Lace and Leather are all quite fun to listen to.

My favorite song on the CD is a track titled If U Seek Amy. In all the reviews I've read, critics always highlight this specific song favorably, but they also say that it's unlikely to be a radio hit because of the sexually explicit chorus. They also suggested to say the title of the song very slowly to see exactly why it will most like be radio-unfriendly. I was probably the last person on the planet to see what everyone is talking about...but after hearing the song, now I indeed do know.

The chorus includes the line "All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to If U Seek Amy." Sounds innocent enough. Then I realized what she was truly saying is "All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to F-U-C-K me." Which is hysterical. Who know Britney Spears could pull off a double-entendre? And I'm sure there are people out there who severely doubt Miss Spears even knows what a double-entendre is--but she pulls it off beautifully. It's kinda like an audio equivalent of a Bratz doll--a little naughtily, but still innocent. I guess the more things change, the more they say the same. So what?

The final song on the CD is Radar, which was originally on her previous CD Blackout (and it was my favorite song on that CD, so it's nice to see it included here as a bonus track).

Being me, I had to purchase the Deluxe Edition of Circus because, let's face it, I'm a whore for bonus content. The bonus content on here are two additional bonus tracks on the CD--the Avril Lavigne-esque Rock Me In and and the techno-y Photography. Nice additions.

But the Deluxe edition also comes with a bonus DVD, which includes a 10-minute documentary on the making of Circus (with pretty articulate interviews Miss Spears herself where she focuses solely on the music), the Director's Cut of the Womanizer Video (with a steam less sauna and a completely nude Britney Spears), and a short photo gallery.

Call it a guilty pleasure. Call it an uncharacteristic lack of taste. But whatever you call it, just also make sure to refer to it as fun stuff. And there's nothing wrong with fun stuff.

And maybe it's not Led Zeppelin but, admittedly, no matter how hard I strive, I just can't achieve that level of sophistication--but I have reached that level of sarcasm, heh heh heh.

Manna From Heaven (2002)

2008-12-03T21:13:00.005-05:00

"Once upon a time, when the world was young,

there was a family of sorts.

Some related by blood, some by marriage,

some by neighborhood, and some by freeloading."

My stomach flu from Thanksgiving violently made a "full force" return engagement last night and continued throughout the day. Amidst alternating between the bathroom and my bed, I managed to pop in a DVD my brother bought me a few years ago that I never watched. It's a small independent film titled Manna From Heaven and it dares to ask, "What happens when a gift from God turns out to be a loan?"

The film is set in Buffalo, NY, which made me immediately love it. The opening alone features awesome familiar sites to me from the city that ranks high on my list of favorites (from my visitis to Buff. to visit my friend Rai-An, who has recently moved with her husband Wolfram to Connecticut, and her family), such as the Albright-Knox Art Gallery and The Anchor Bar (the birthplace of the Buffalo Wing that not only features great live jazz, but an excellent glass of White Zinfandel).

The movie opens sometime in the 1950s in a small house populated by family, friends neighbors and, yes, freeloaders--each with desires and dreams of their own. All of a sudden, money begins to rain from the sky outside, like a gift from God. After grabbing all they can and averaging about $3,100 per person (in 1950s dollars), the gift receives it s final blessing from young and God-fearing Theresa, who declares it a miracle.

Several years later, Theresa (Urusla Burton) has become a nun and requests the presence of all those who were in the house that miraculous day because she has decided that every dollar must be paid back. By Easter Sunday. Which is a mere six weeks away. But to who? And where will they now get the money they've spent when they're struggling themselves? Theresa suggest several ideas to raise money for the community, from raffling off a high-end automobile to a dance contest. But the once lucky recipients of the heavenly money has other ideas.

Manna From Heaven features an impressive ensemble of actors (for some reason, I'm catching a lot of ensemble flicks these days, like State & Main and Beauty Shop), including Cloris Leachman (from Dancing With the Stars fame) who has never won anything in her life and is pining all of her hopes on winning the car, Wendie Malick (Just Shoot Me), Jill Eikenberry, Austin Pendleton, Shelley Duvall, Louise Fletcher, Seymour Cassell, Harry Groener,\--everyone is fantastic in the flick.\. The standout performance has to be Shirley Jones as Bunny who, with her husband (the late, great Frank Gorshin) manage to con their way across the country--from stealing "new outfits" from Lost-and-Founds around the city, to having "a dozen library cards, and it's a hard job remembering which ones have fines on them," to their plans to fix the raffle so they can win the new car. She's a hoot.

My only complaint about the movie was that, at a running time to exactly two hours, it was a tad long for a comedy. But overall I really had a great time watching Manna From Heaven.

And, YES, I'm feeling a lot better, thank you. Bless you, Imodium AD!

Jazz Icons: Nina Simone Live in '65 and '68 (2008)

2008-12-02T10:31:00.005-05:00

I have a very short list of people who I want to see in concert. Back in 2000, Nina Simone was at the top of that list. And I can proudly say that on June 10, 2000, I had the pleasure and rare opportunity of going with my brother to Philadelphia to see Nina Simone live in concert on her High Priestess Tour. Rare because Simone rarely toured the United States. And rare because Simone passed away in a mere three years later in 2003.

An audience member undergoes just as much internal and meticulous preparation as does Nina Simone herself. She was a legendary diva, with a legendary temperament--she expected just as much from her audience (if not more) as the audience expected of her. If she wants silence, you zip it shut. And if she wants audience participation, damnit, you better damn well participate (and you'd better sing loud or else).

I remember the show began at 8 with a really horrendous opening act, thirty minutes of someone reciting bad poetry to musical accompaniment. After she finished at 8:30, the audience waited...and waited...and waited for Dr. Simone to take the stage. At about 9:45 (at which point I admit I was a little pissed and almost tempted to leave), the announcer proclaimed, "And now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome...Dr...Nina...Simone." The audience went nuts as she waved a feather (it was Philadelphia, after all).

Assisted to her piano, she sat and began to play Black is the Color of My True Love's Hair. From the first note she played and the first time I hear that distinctive voice live, all was forgiven the next moment. She went all to play all of my favorites that I had only heard on CD--George Harrison's Here Comes The Sun, Bob Dylan's Just Like A Woman, her first hit I Loves You Porgy, her own compositions Four Women, and Mississippi Goddam (which she had planned for the end of the show, but played it as her third song at the audience's request), she shimmied to See Line Woman, and concluded her concert with her self-penned anthem To Be Young, Gifted and Black. And she, of course, stood up from her piano after each song and waved her feather. She was also very interactive with the audience, encouraging us to sing along with her (I more than happily obliged), insisting "I'll take that applause" and even telling audience members, "I love you too, sugar."

It was truly a magical night, one I will never forget. And side-by-side with seeing Marianne Faithfull at Town Hall in NYC, it remains the best concert I have ever seen.

That being said, Nina's magic as a live performer is captured on the recently released DVD Jazz Icons: Nina Simone Live in '65 and '68. Of course, Nina Simone was the High Priestess of Soul and hated being referred to as a jazz artist, but this collection of two rare black and white European performances are superb, no matter what the label is.

In both concerts, performed, over thirty years before I myself saw her live, Nina Simone demonstrated the same warmth and appreciation from her audience as she did in 2000. Each performance runs about 30 minutes; and each features an entirely different selection of songs, though a primary focus on both set lists is her dedication to civil rights.

Highlights from the Holland concert, set in a traditional concert hall in Holland in 1965, include Brown Baby, Four Women, Go Limp (where she encourages audience participation) and ends with Mississippi Goddam.

The second concert, filmed in England in 1968, features the audience surrounding Nina on benches. She opens with Go To Hell, continues with Hair medley Ain't Got No-I Got Life, Backlash Blues (a poem by Langston Hughes set to original music by Simone), I Put A Spell On You, and Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood (a song that she was the first to record, way before The Animals had a hit with it). She concludes the set with Why? (The King of Love is Dead), a moving tribute dedicated to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr that was written by her bassist mere hours following the assassination.

Nothing can ever compare to the experience of seeing Dr. Nina Simone live, but this DVD collection is a wonderful archived testament to the performer she is and the performer she always will be remembered for being.

To Be Free: The Nina Simone Story (Box Set) (2008)

2008-12-01T19:42:00.006-05:00

Nina Simone is one of my favorite all-time singers/songwriters/musicians. Often incorrectly labelled as a jazz artists, Nina Simone does incorporate jazz into some of her music--but she also performs popular songs, folk tunes, the blues, African chants, and everything in-between. She was also a prominent writer of protest songs in the 1960s, vocalizing her frustration and angst on compositions such as Four Women and Mississippi Goddam. She was known as the High Priestess of Soul and, toward the end of her career, Dr. Nina Simone.

Thanks to some store credit from FYE on a few DVDs I'm upgrading to Blu-Ray, I managed to score myself a decently-priced copy of her first box set---To Be Free: The Nina Simone Story. The 3 CDs in the set cover her entire music career from her first single I Loves You Porgy in 1957 to 1993's A Single Woman, her final CD. The major focus here are her years at RCA (1968-1974), and a lot of the material is a duplication of CDs and compilations I already own, but there are a lot of rare gems here as well, including never-before-released live performances.

The true jewel in the box set is the final disc, a DVD of the 1970 Emmy Award nominated documentary NINA: A Historical Perspective, which features rare live performances and interviews by the High Priestess of Soul herself. I'd never seen Simone interviewed before, so those particular parts of the doc were a true treat for me.

I'm so glad I bought this truly amazing collection.

Beauty Shop (2005)

2008-11-30T13:41:00.006-05:00

"And now E! presents the Movie We Love...Beauty Shop!"

Nine times out of ten, my TV will be tuned into E! And they must've shown the movie Beauty Shop nine or ten times in the past two weeks. I first saw the flick a couple of years ago on a bus returning home from a day in New York City; I was half paying attention and half listening to my iPod. But what I saw I really, really liked. So I bought the DVD a couple of days later, and then it proceeded to sit on my shelf, unwatched, for some time. So with E! constantly showing an edited version (the film was originally rated R, but won a PG-13 on appeal), I decided to watch my still-unwatched DVD copy.

Serving as somewhat of a spin-off from the Barbershop series of movies, Beauty Shop stars Queen Latifah as hairstylist Gina, who works in a high end salon in Atlanta called Jorge's, owned and operated by the asinine and rude Jorge (Kevin Bacon goes effeminate in an unexpected and hysterical turn). Still, Gina is a favorite of Jorge's clients, including a Southern belle having marital problems (Andie MacDowell) and a stuck-up but good hearted young businesswoman (Mena Suvari). She's also good friends with country bumpkin and shampoo girl Lynn (Alicia Silverstone).

Gina is also a widow and mother of a young pianist prodigy named Vanessa, and she dreams of one day owning her own beauty salon. One day, Gina decides she had had enough of Jorge and up and quits the salon, taking the devoted Lynn with her. She gets a small bank loan (after impressing the loan officer with her hairstyling skills) and opens up Gina's Beauty Salon, which slowly becomes a success and steals away Gina's dedicated clients from Jorge. And Jorge will do everything in his power (from building inspectors to vandalism) to shut Gina's down. But Gina perseveres with her friends, her dedicated clientele, her reliable homemade "Hair Crack" conditioner and a little unexpected help from radio DJ Holla' at Helen.

Beauty Shop is a sassy flick that's very, very funny, and you don't want it to end. Latifah's hilarious turn as Gina serves as the center from the amazing ensemble of actors that portray her clients and employees. Alfrie Woodard (who constantly quotes Maya Angelou poems), Keisha Knight-Pulliam (Rudy Huxtable all grown up) and The View's Sherri Shepard (whose hair color changes to match the mood she's in) also give very funny performances. The film also stars Bryce Wilson as metrosexual, "is-he-or-isn't-he-gay" stylist James, Djimon Hounsou as Gina's electrician/pianist potential love interest and, coincidentally, Hounsou's real-life main squeeze Kimora Lee Simmons (E!'s Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane) as one of Gina's clients (I wonder if the two first met on the set of this movie?).

In short, E!'s not the only one who loves it!

Duffy: Rockferry (Deluxe Edition) (2008)

2008-11-29T20:45:00.006-05:00

I arrived home today after a particularly harrowing day at work to find a present for me from Amazon UK--the just-released-this-week Deluxe Edition of Rockferry by Duffy. What's equally harrowing is the fact that this is the third copy of the CD I purchased this year.

Conciseness isn't in my fragile nature, so let me explain...at length, of course:

First and foremost, though I LOVE iTunes, I still prefer to purchase physical CDs; I always have and will continue to do so. Even in this digital age, I like to own something I can hold, something physical and tangible--especially if these physical and tangible things include cover art and can be prominently displayed to look at while the computer is off.

Back in February, Duffy's song Mercy was the Free Single of the Week on iTunes, so I decided to give it a listen...and LOVED it. It was a soulful throwback to the British resurgence of the sound of the 60s that began with Amy Winehouse. Mercy was soulful and infectious, and Duffy reminded me a lot of Dusty Springfield. To this day, it's still in my top 10 all-time most-played tracks on my iTunes.

So I immediately did what I always to, which is I went to Amazon to purchase the entire CD. Unfortunately, it wasn't even listed. So remembering Duffy was from the UK, I tried Amazon UK and, sure enough, there it was listed with a March 3rd (or as they write on the British Isles, 3 Mar 2008) upcoming release date. I pre-ordered the CD, titled Rockferry, and eagerly waited it arrival.

Shortly after it was shipped, I met my friend Kirsten in New York City to catch the abysmal Spring Awakening. While waiting for her to arrive at Penn Station by train from Trenton, NJ, I hung out in the city alone. My first stop was, of course, the Virgin Megastore on Times Square. And guess what CD they had in stock as an import? For $24.99? And guess who was so impatient to listen to it that he bought a copy, even though the one he ordered was in the mail and scheduled to arrive any day? (embarrassingly raises hand). To rationalize my purchase in my extravagant little head, I promised Kirsten to mail her the copy of Rockferry I would receive in the mail.

Once back home, I listened to Duffy's Rockferry straight through twice in a row. I loved every second of every song. The CD surpassed my huge expectations by miles. In addition to Mercy, standout tracks that went right onto my iPod were Stepping Stone, Hanging On Too Long, Warwick Avenue, Delayed Devotion, and I'm Scared. It was just a kick-ass CD, and I liked the theme of longing for love that ran throughout all of the tracks; it really reminded me of those great female singers of the early 1960s, but with a modern twist.

On a side note, her track Syrup & Honey was recently featured in a series of TV ads for Nivea Lip Balm. That was my least favorite track until I kept hearing it on TV, so it grew on me fast, and I just added it to my iTunes as well.

On my frequent trips to New York this year, and after Rockferry's official US release (at $7.99, no less, but I didn't regret purchasing it--TWICE--in the least), I habitually checked the Duffy section at the Megastore just for kicks. Of course, the import CD singles were released one by one--with one previously unreleased non-album track on each one, backing the main single from Rockferry. Being a completest when it comes to my music, I purchased each one as they were released--at an addition $6.99 a pop. Which, I must say, I do not regret because the new tracks (Tomorrow, Put It In Perspective, and Frame Me) were always great.

Then on one of my usual checks to see what is selling in music at Amazon UK, I discovered that a Deluxe Edition of Rockferry was prepping for release. This time, it was also listed at Amazon US as an import. So being in these troubling economic times that we're unfortunately in, I went for the least expensive option--Amazon UK, believe it or not.

Don't believe me? Well then, doubting Thomas (or Doubting whatever the fuck your name is), check out the listing for the Deluxe Edition of Rockferry on Amazon.com and compare it with the same listing on Amazon.co.uk--then use the currency converter on XE.com and voila. You see? Even with shipping, it was less expensive to have it sent from the UK--15.06 in pounds, which equals $23.11, compared to the $29.49 the US version is charging as a Import, even BEFORE shipping costs are factored in. Trust a compulsive shopper--he'll never steer you wrong.

Yes, I know it is kind of ridiculous to buy the CD for a third time in one year. But the ultimate selling factor for me was the bonus disc of previously unreleased tracks included in the package, and I am both proud and pleasantly surprised to tell you that none of the seven track were ever issued--not even on the 3 import CD singles I purchased in addition.

But I'm a realist as well. I discovered that, yes, there are indeed seven previously unreleased tracks--totally a little over 24 minutes. realistically this could've just been added to the original disc, which has a total playing time of 38 minutes. As a matter of fact, not only would it have fit on a single disc, but there would have space on the CD to spare. But record companies are the way they are, and always will be, so I can opt to either bitch and complain about it or accept it (shit or get off the pot, so to speak).

The bonus disc is, overall, another winner. It kicks off with Duffy's latest single, Rain On Your Parade, which is a kickin' track. Very similar to Mercy in sound; however, rather than begging for mercy, Miss Duffy is planning to screw him over as a revenge tactic. Great song. A definite iPod add-on. Fool For You has a 70s vibe goin' on, very Sharleen Spiteri. Another iPod must. Stop (which has a "Theme from Shaft" vibe), Oh Boy (a little too folksy for my taste), and Please Stay (a little weepy and over dramatic and--dare I say it--a tad country) were merely okay tracks, but still not horrible. However, the last two tracks--Breaking My Own Heart and the Partridge Family-ish Enough Love--brought the bonus disc back into a positive light to bestow it with a rave. And I'll probably grow to like the other songs with subsequent listens, as I did with Syrup & Honey.

To make a long story short (too late), maybe some may say that a 2-disc Deluxe Edition of Rockferry wasn't really absolutely necessary to warrant a release. Maybe it's just another in a string of many attempts by those greedy record companies to squeeze a few extra dollars out of the music-going public, a mere trick to essentially get those moronic consumers to basically buy the same record they already own a second time.

But remember that this is the third time I bought it, so I don't count.

State and Main (2000)

2008-11-28T19:54:00.003-05:00

I just finished watching David Mamet's 2000 film State and Main, which I borrowed from work. I didn't know what to expect solely because it was David Mamet (I LOVED Oleanna, but I HATED House of Games).

I LOVED State and Main. What made the film appeal to me so much is Mamet's use of the concept of an incredible ensemble cast, similar to the work of Robert Altman and Christopher Guest.

The concept of State and Main is similar in a sense to Sunset Boulevard because it deals with the horrors of what Hollywood can do; but State and Main takes horror a step further to another altogether terrifying experience---filming on location. The movie is set on-location in Waterford, Vermont, where the sole claim to fame is an immense pothole on Main Street. Waterford is also where a historical Hollywood epic is about to be filmed---and the cast and crew turn small town America upside down.

There's the high-strung director trying to cope with everything (William H. Macy); the mayor (Charles Durning) and his wife (Patti LuPone) who welcome Hollywood with open arms---that is until they accidentally miss dinner; the lead actor (Alec Baldwin), who has a fondness for underage girls; the waitress/high school student (Julia Stiles) who becomes the apple of said actor's eye; the high strung movie star (Sarah Jessica Parker) who refuses to take her top off; the screenwriter (Phillip Seymor Hoffman, in a standout performance) who is going crazy figuring out how to rewrite a film called The Old Mill when the Old Mill in town burned down in the 1960s; the bookstore owner and local actress (Rebecca Pidgeon, who gives the best performance in a sea of great performances) who befriends and falls in love with the screenwriter; the Hollywood lawyer (David Paymer) who is trying to keep everyone involved in check (and covering it up if need be); and the small-town lawyer (Clark Gregg) with political aspirations. All mix and mingle as a small New England town meets the insanity of Hollywood.

Also of note are the blink-and-you'll-miss-them appearances of The Office's John Krasinski (in a non-speaking part as a judge's assistant) and Laura Silverman (Sarah's sister and co-star of The Sarah Silverman Program) as a Hollywood secretary.

I loved State and Main simply because it was fun to watch. It's also officially added to my DVD To-Buy list.

My favorite line in the flick is when director William H. Macy is accused of lying, to which he responds, "It's not a lie. It's a gift for fiction."

Sunset Boulevard: The Centennial Collection (1950)

2008-11-28T15:29:00.006-05:00

"You're Norma Desmond. You used to be in silent pictures. You used to be big."

"I AM big. It's the PICTURES that got small."

Sunset Boulevard is one of the greatest motion pictures ever made. Directed and co-written by the legendary Billy Wilder, it's a Hollywood film that is quite anti-Hollywood, demonstrating that it's a town that build you up then spits you out and forgets you.

It's also one of the oost quoted films in existence. "All Right, Mr. Demille. I'm ready for my close-up." "We didn't need dialogue, we had FACES!" and the like.

I recently upgraded my Special Collector's Edition DVD of Sunset Boulevard from 2002 with the recently released 2-disc Centennial Edition of the film. Most of the special features are mere duplications from the previous release, but there are some new goodies as well that make me pleased with my decision to upgrade.

(Warning: the rest of this blog entry is saturated with spoilers.)

The film begins with the discovery of the dead body in a swimming pool. The deceased, failed screenwriter and reluctant gigolo Joe Gillis, then proceeds to tell the viewer, via his voiceover and a flashback that lasts nearly the length of the feature) how he came to be in his present and decidedly permanent state.

Joe Gillis (played by the brilliant William Holden, in the role that shifted his acting career back into gear) was a screenwriter for Paramount who can't sell a script and a favorite target of the creditors that want his car back (and you can't get around Los Angeles without a car). Following a car chase, Gillis luckily (or unluckily, given the events that unfold), ends up hiding his car in the garage of a dilapidated mansion on Sunset Boulevard. Under false pretenses and via a mysterious women shouting at him from a window, Joe is invited in by Max, the butler of the mansion (the always amazing and frightening Erich von Stroheim), upstairs. There he is confronted by a middle-aged woman in sunglasses shouting orders about the upcoming funeral of her recently deceased companion---a chimpanzee.

Joe admits his error, but not before realizing that this woman is actually silent screen star Norma Desmond (the incomparable Gloria Swanson in her first film role in nine years), whose acting career no longer exists. After hearing he is a screenwriter, the eerie Norma hires Joe to help her with the script she is writing for her return (NOT COMEBACK, mind you) to the screen--the story of Salome, in which Norma was star and Cecil B. de Mille will direct---according to Norma herself, who is quite delusional. Joe eventually moves into Norma's decaying Hollywood mansion.

Norma is under the impression that she is still a star with millions of fans feeling betrayed that she left the screen in the first place. Her house is surrounded by photos from her past in films, she answers mountains of fan mail begging for her return to the silver screen, and she plays cards with who Joe refers to as the "waxworks" who include fellow former silent film stars Buster Keaton, Anna Q. Nilsson and H. B Warner in cameo roles. She even watches her old silent films on a big screen in her living room (interestingly, the film shown is 1929's Queen Kelly, a real film starring the real Gloria Swanson and directed by the real Erich von Stroheim, which was said to have ruined both of their Hollywood careers). She is also dying to return to the screen and is an actress on the verge--slightly suicidal t the point that all the glass in the house is hidden away (not to mention that all locks on the room doors are removed).

Norma also starts to fall in love with a restless Joe--she throws him parties (at which Joe and Norma are the only guests(, he buys him expensive clothes, she entertains him with eerie impressions of Charlie Chaplin (complete with moustache courtesy of a burnt match), and she even slices her own wrists when he rejects her. Ultimately, Joe reluctantly becomes her lover.

In one of the film's most famous scenes, Norma returns to Paramount Studios to visit Cecil B. de Mille (appearing in a cameo role), who is filming his latest biblical epic Samson and Delilah. The image of Norma watching de Mille film a take as a boom mike bumps into her hat feather is symbolic and priceless. What Norma doesn't know, however, is that the director has no interest in either her or her disaster of a script of Salome--he merely wants to borrow her antique automobile for a film. Being that she has no notion of this, she sets about on a beauty and health regiment to amke herself look twenty years younger (a brilliant montage in the film).

Meanwhile, Joe is trying to escape the tight clutch of the overbearing Norma. He teams up with Betty Schaeffer, a no-nonsense Paramount script reader (played with sweet sincerity by Nancy Olson) to develop a script. As they collaborate, Joe and Betty start to fall for each other, but Betty is engaged to Joe's best friend.

The final scenes of the film are fraught with revelations--butler Max is actually Norma Desmond's former director and former husband, and it is he solely who has been writing those fan letters to Norma all of these years. Joe has also come down with a sudden case of morality and, after sending Betty back to her fiancee), bids farewell to Norma to return to Ohio.

These revelations finally drive Norma Desmond over the edge, in which she kills Joe in a rage.

Back in the present, Norma Desmond is officially a certifiable nut, believing in the delusion that she is a star. She descends the staircase amidst reporters and news cameras---and under the direction of Max. After giving a little speech, she announces, "All right, Mr. de Mille. I'm ready for my close-up." As she frighteningly and slowly walks towards the camera, the images blurs, forever denying Norma the close-up she lives for.

The End.

Gloria Swanson is a revelation in Sunset Boulevard. She is so convincing, in fact, that I believed for a long time (up until recently, actually) that she was actually like her character in real life. Imagine my surprise at seeing an interview with her from the 1970s (in one of the documentaries that is included as a special feature on the DVD). My favorite line of the film is when Gloria Swanson states, "I can say anything I want with my eyes." It's a fitting line, because you can count on one hand the number of times that she blinks in the film. The character of Norma Desmond is living as she is in a silent film , and this is made evident in her lack of blinking and her dramatic gesture.

Still regarded as one of the best movies ever made, Sunset Boulevard still manages to hold up with its brilliant performances, superb direction, and classic Hollywood storytelling.

It remains one of my favorite movies of all time.

WALL-E (2008)

2008-11-27T21:36:00.005-05:00

Thanksgiving is a truly horrible day to be ill. I mean, nausea and stomach pain isn't particularly fun on any day unless you consider yourself a sadist, but it's particularly horrible on a holiday, a day where all you want to do is enjoy your day off from work with your family.

But I got through it in one piece, thanks to the help of my nephew DJ and my younger niece Bailee. This morning, the three of us decided to catch some wholesome family TV. We started with the live broadcast of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, followed by the DVD for WALL-E (which I borrowed from work) and the DVD for the Radio City Music Hall Christmas Spectacular. The parade was pretty good (I was the first time I watched it in years), and the kids were on-the-fence about the Radio City Christmas until I played the DVD at twice the speed and the Rockettes kicked twice as fast (which the kids laughed their asses off about). But the one we all agreed was the best was WALL-E. It was so good, in fact, that I will be adding the Blu-Ray to my collection in the very near future.

Set about 700 years into the future, the movie tells the story of WALL-E, a mini trash compactor robot who tirelessly makes skyscrapers out of the compacted trash on the inhospitable Earth. But WALL-E isn't your average robot. He is very self-sufficient--he knows to take shelter when the windstorms come, and he keeps a collection of interesting trash he finds--from spare parts to repair himself to bubble wrap to videotapes of musicals. He also has a cockroach as a best friend.

Out of nowhere, a spaceship arrives, leaving behind a female robot named EVE. After reacting violently and defensively at first, EVE takes a liking to WALL-E, and the two start to fall for each other. WALL-E shows EVE all of his treasures and even presents EVE with a gift of a new plant. When she accepts the plant, EVE freezes--she no longer moves or speaks.

The spaceship returns to collect EVE and WALL-E hops on as well. Their space travels take them to a ship called AXIUM, which houses the remaining descendants of the human population from the Earth; AXIUM also has an almost equal robot population. The whole ship is overseen by the Captain, who doesn't seem to care that the humans don't even have to walk and are morbidly obese.

In the meantime, EVE is soon revived, and WALL-E learns that his gift of the budding plant is the key to take the entire population of AXIUM back to Earth because it proves vegetation is again possible on the barren planet. But someone or something on AXIUM will do everything in his power to keep the return to Earth from ever occurring.

I don't know if it was the pace of the movie or just my feeling under the weather, but I must admit I found the first half-hour of WALL-E a little boring; and I even started to doze off a little, but the story kicked in really soon after that. Also, there is almost no dialogue in the first forty-five minutes of WALL-E (only the brief occasions where WALL-E and EVE address each other by name). I even have to admit that I got a little teary-eyed at the end, which is sating something about a film that is essentially a love story between two robots.

Also, make sure to watch the credits, which have some very funny visual jokes.

An extra-cool Special Feature on the DVD is the set of Pixar shorts--BURN-E features a robot character seen briefly in WALL-E in one of his own adventures, and Presto is a hilarious short about a mischievous rabbit who simply wants a carrot; when his magician partner ignores his request, Presto makes his act a painful nightmare of one accident after another.

I can honestly say that I've never seen a Disney Pixar film that I hated but WALL-E, overall, was extraordinary and features of the most amazing animation I've ever seen.

Can't wait to get this one on Blu-Ray.

Crazy Yapping Dog from The Soup

2008-11-25T09:53:00.003-05:00

This hysterically funny YouTube clip was a centerpiece of this week's episode of The Soup. It reminds me of holiday shoppers.

Get Smart (2008)

2008-11-23T20:26:00.003-05:00

Usually when I watch a flick, my reaction is very clear-cut. I either love it, or I hate it. Rarely is my reaction, "Eh, it was OK." Well, I just finished watching the DVD of Get Smart with my nephew DJ and, well...eh, it was OKAY. I didn't love it, I didn't hate it. I did enjoy watching it, but I won't be buying the Blu-Ray for my collection.

The cast was really good, especially Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway. I laughed out loud at some of the jokes, but others you could see them coming from a mile away and fell flat. The action scenes were good, but not the best I've ever seen. And the ending was a little suspenseful, but the concert finale was very similar to Eagle Eye.

So, in summary, Get Smart was...eh, okay.

Sin in Soft Focus: Pre-Code Hollywood by Mark A. Vieira (2003)

2008-11-23T11:15:00.008-05:00

I decided to continue my self-education into pre-code Hollywood films, a fascination that began with the documentaries Thou Shalt Not: Sex, Sin and Censorship in Pre-Code Hollywood and Why Be Good?: Sexuality and Censorship in Early Cinema. So I turned to a reliable source--film historian and author book Mark A. Vieira's Sin in Soft Focus: Pre-Code Hollywood.

And what a book it was. I was really excited to read this particular book because Vieira has both appeared in the documentary Thou Shalt Not and written my favorite book on Greta Garbo titled Greta Garbo: A Cinematic Legacy (his book on Garbo was unique because it was a film star's biography that focused solely on the making of her films, as opposed to speculation on her private life--a unique perspective). So I was aware from the start that Vieira was a reputable source of film history--and an interesting guy himself.

The coffee table book strictly focuses on the Hollywood films made from 1930 to 1934, where a Production Code was an attempt by the film industry to loosely self-censor itself that eventually was officially enforced thanks to the efforts by outsiders of the film industry (particularly the Catholic Church). This was a time of radical change in Hollywood; silent films to "talkies"; the prosperity of the 1920s to the reality of the Great Depression; and the new medium of radio as a major competitor to the tried-and-true success of motion pictures.

In addition to all of this information on the films themselves made during that brief period, as well as hundreds of stills from pre-Code Hollywood films (many of which no longer exist), I became aware of the fact that I didn't know as much as I thought I did regarding this subject. For example even I was a little shocked about what filmmakers were able to get away with back then, in terms of content. Even today, 1933's Baby Face starring Barbara Stanwyck is still one of the most shocking films I've ever seen.

The stars of the books are the pre-Code films themselves. Vieira's vivid desriptions of these movies gave me dozens of "I want to see that" moments.

A very surprising factor to me what that William Hays wasn't really the snaggle-toothed monster to Hollywood that he was widely portrayed as--on the contrary, his role was more along the lines of a mediator or liaison between Hollywood producers and the state censor boards. So I no longer viewed him completely as the bad guy that everyone seemed to agree that he was. He was naive, YES, but not a complete enemy to Hollywood.

Another interesting factor from that period of film making was just how easy it was to get a film's censored status overturned with few cuts (if any). All they had to do was prove that the "debauchery" was punished in the film's final frame, and it was no longer morally objectionable to the Hays Office. Movies from this time also pioneered the use of alternative footage and multiple endings, just in case.

What was even more shocking was the number of state film boards in existence at that time (according to John Waters, I believe Maryland was the last to relinquish this hold, and even this event didn't take place until a few years ago). Therefore, even a movie okayed by the Production Code would be censored by the state censor boards, who was legally permitted to snip away whatever sections of the films they deemed objectionable. With this fact, isn't it fascinating that the very same film you see in New York would, with few exceptions, be an entirely different film when you saw it in Pennsylvania?

Religion also played a bigger part of this chaos than I originally believed. Even more appalling is the amount of unspoken but present anti-semitism prevailing throughout Hollywood. It was no secret that many of the studio heads, directors, producers and writers were Jewish; and the powers-that-be that objected to the content of their product made it no secret among themselves how they really felt about this fact. At times, I see that their offensive talk was more offensive than what was supposedly so offensive on the silver screen.

And can you imagine a priest standing on his pulpit ordering his parishioners to take a vow never to see this film or that film? The Catholic Legion of Decency did just this, motivating the masses to protest to save the immortal souls of themselves and the rest of the movie going public.

And if you want hypocrisy personified, look no further than Joseph Breen, the moralistic family man who took the reigns over from William Hays on July 1, 1934 when, thanks to a Catholic boycott of films in Philadelphia and a threat to break up the monopolies of film studio and theater ownership, the Production Code of 1934 became film law. Breen was an upstanding pillar of the community, the moral overseer of what was godly and decent--yet a liberal user of profanity in private meetings with the studio bosses. Yes this man now had sole approval of Hollywood film scripts, that needed his stamp before even filming on a project commenced.

So as of the official and strict enforcement of the Production Code of 1934, the future moral strength of all Hollywood entertainment released to the public, rested on the oh-so-capable shoulders of a single Catholic man with no film background and a penchant for swearing. The very fact that this was the excepted way of doing things in Hollywood until the late 1960s is perhaps the most offensive factor of all.

Hollywood submitted and played along, in turn becoming even more clever in its scriptwriting so that objectionable-but-heavily-disguised dialogue, situations and innuendo got passed the censors with no objection at all.

The biggest tragedy of all was the pre-Code films being heavily sliced, diced and censored for Breen's stamp of approval for re-release in cinemas. Original negatives of pre-code films were modified for Breen's okay and, with a few exceptions, were never available again in their original form. The saddest case is that of a silly sex romp titled Convention City, which the studio opted to destroy--every negative, every print--rather than censor.

Did the strict limits of the Production Code of 1934 make Hollywood more creative? Perhaps it did...but was it really necessary? This, I believe, is the true question, isn't it?

The film concludes with the actual complete text of the Production Code of 1930.

Vieira's excellent book brought out all of these passionate feelings in me about what I, as a devout film goer, has the right to see and decide for myself what is or is not objectionable.

One plus, however, in all of this was that the discovery of the volume of prints of pre-Code films, uncut and uncensored, that have been discovered in film vaults and libraries throughout the United States. Now, I eagerly await each new DVD collection of Forbidden Hollywood, a series of DVDs released by Warner Bros. and MGM that allow the opportunity of a new generation of moviegoers to joyfully wallow in pre-Code cinema sit...and oooooooooooooooooo, what a lather.

Sin in Soft Focus is an excellent study in pre-Code Hollywood that comes highly recommended. Mark A. Vieira certainly knows his stuff, and you won't read a better book about this subject.

At Work by Annie Leibovitz (2008)

2008-11-22T20:58:00.004-05:00

I just finished reading Annie Leibovitz's new book, simply titled At Work.

Having loved the documentary Annie Leibovitz: Life Through A Lens, I attacked her latest volume with gusto.

At Work is a series of essays and editorials by Annie Leibovitz on some of her most famous photographs and subjects, which are also included with the text. I must say it was very intriguing reading the stories of the photographs from the photographer's point-of-view.

Leibovitz isn't dishy, and her writing style is very direct and matter-of-fact, which I found refreshing. The text gives insight, but isn't so specific that it spoils the magic of the actual photographs, which speak for themselves.

The book concludes with some technical questions posed to Leibovitz about photography, as well as the ten questions she is most frequently asked about her work as a photographer.

I enjoyed the book, though not as much as I enjoyed the documentary.

Jersey Girl (2004)

2008-11-22T11:11:00.003-05:00

When writer/director Kevin Smith’s Jersey Girl was released in 2004, I can imagine that some of the die-hard fans of his previous View Askew movies (Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, and Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back) were greatly disappointed, while others thought it was the best film he made so far. Jersey Girl maybe left some of his hardcore fans scratching their heads, wondering why Smith traded in what some may refer to as his “Bread-and-Butter,” (raunchy-but-smart comedies heavily seasoned with “dick and fart jokes,” not to mention Jay and Silent Bob) for a more heartwarming film inspired by Smith’s own experiences becoming a father about how single fatherhood changes a formerly selfish man.

Ben Affleck gives a really terrific performance as Ollie Trinke, a NYC publicist and workaholic who appears on the surface has it all—a high-paying job that he loves and that he excels at, a wife that he adores, and a baby on the way. The only problem is that Ollie’s job always comes first; in fact, he puts more focus on his job than his impending fatherhood or his wife Gertrude (Jennifer Lopez).

After Gertrude tragically dies while giving birth to their daughter (and her namesake) Gertie, a grief-striken Ollie finds it too painful to even hold his infant daughter Gertie and opts to bury himself in work instead. He returns to New Jersey to stay with his father Bart (the always incredible late, great George Carlin) and, for a time, relies on him to be the sole caregiver of Gertie. A frustrated Ollie even loses his job after an infamous incident where he disses both a group of reporters at a press conference and Will Smith, all in one breath.

Then Gertie and Ollie have a “talk” in one of the film’s most moving scenes. Though the month-old infant Gertie can only smile and doesn’t even understand what he is saying, Ollie tearfully pours his heart out to his baby about losing her mother, and he vows then and there to be the best father he can be to her.

Years pass and Gertie (played by Raquel Castro in an absolutely wonderful performance in this, her film debut)grows up to be an incredibly funny and smart 9 year-old, who is daddy’s little girl and the apple of Ollie’s eye. Ollie enjoys an unexpected friendship and a little flirtation with graduate student and video store clerk Maya (a groovy Liv Tyler, fresh off of The Lord of the Rings trilogy). Ollie even joins his father in working for the borough.

But Ollie soon begins to yearn for the hustle and bustle of his former life New York and gets an interview with another publicity firm—scheduled for the night of Gertie’s school show. Gertie doesn’t want to move away from her school and her new family, and there is a confrontation scene between Gertie and Ollie (that parallels the same argument he had with his wife ten years ago), and heated words are exchanged. This scene just rips your heart out.

However, while waiting for his interview, Ollie has an epiphany thanks to Will Smith (in a cameo role as himself) in the waiting room, and he realizes just how much he loves his daughter-and he makes it back to New Jersey just in time to join Gertie on stage for her school show. Though Jersey Girl’s finale has a happy ending, it’s not an ending where every situation is put right and every problem is solved.

I must say that I really enjoyed Jersey Girl. I loved all of his previous View Askew comedies, but this one was still distinctively a Kevin Smith movie that just showed a different side of him as a filmmaker. I mean, every great filmmaker wants to do something altogether different from his trademark films, and Smith succeeds.

The entire ensemble cast was great. I’m not the biggest fan of Ben Affleck, but I was really impressed with him as Ollie. George Carlin is great, as always. Liv Tyler and Jason Biggs also turn in fine performances. The cameos by Will Smith, Jason Lee, and Matt Damon were highlights as well. But to be honest, the actor I was blown away by was little Raquel Castro as Gertie, who stole the show from her seasoned co-stars every time she appeared onscreen.

And I can honestly say that Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez do have genuine chemistry together in Jersey Girl. And they were really good together on-screen. They only appear together in the first 12 minutes of Jersey Girl, but those 12 short minutes were 5000% better than the entire length of Gigli (YES, I did see Gigli…in the theater…on opening weekend…it sucked ass).

Smith states on the commentary that there is an extended cut of Jersey Girl, with about an extra 30 minutes not included in the original theatrical release of the movie. He also mentions that it would probably be released sometime in the next couple of years. I hope he follows through because I’d really like to see what was left on the cutting room floor, especially the scenes with Bennifer (which were rumored to have been trimmed due to the recent critical and commercial failure of Gigli).

Unfortunately, there are zero of those deleted scenes as extras on the DVD. But there are two groovy commentaries, a couple of Making-Of featurettes and, as the best extra feature (IMHO), the complete collection of "Roadside Attractions," hilarious skits that originally appeared on The Tonight Show of Smith’s visits to out-of-the-way tourist attractions.

In summary, I’ve been a big fan of Kevin Smith before Jersey Girl, I’m an even bigger fan of Smith’s because of Jersey Girl. What can I say? I’m just a big fan of Kevin Smith.

Master Class by Terrence McNally (1998)

2008-11-20T22:22:00.006-05:00

Are we really missing something when we read a play, as opposed to watching a performance of it? Maybe. Then again, maybe not. I suppose it depends on the richness of the text itself, and whether the characters, stage direction, and dialogue are so vivid that you can actually see the performance in your head. With this in mind, I must say I really enjoyed reading Terrence McNally's 1995 play Master Class. It played beautifully in my imagination.

Unfortunately, I've never seen an actual performance of any of McNally's play, but I hope to do so when his next play opens on Broadway. But I have read another one of his plays, Frankie and Johnny in the Clair de Lune and enjoyed that play as well.

Master Class is an altogether different piece for McNally because its main protagonist was a real person. The character? La Divina, the legendary opera star Maria Callas. McNally based Master Class on the vocal classes she coached at Julliard toward the end of her life.

Let's not mince words...on the surface, McNally's Maria Callas is a first-class, grade A, all-around bitch. She's self-absorbed, she's narcissistic, she's intensely critical of her students, she's demanding, she's ruthless...she's even human.

The play is simple..Maria Callas holds private vocal lessons for three music students (two women, one man). And that's it. On the surface, at least.

McNally's Callas expects her students to know exactly what she expects, how they are to improve according to her standards, no matter how vague her instructions are. Callas has set her standards skyward and expects nothing but perfection.

In between her brutal criticism, her pontification, her tearing down the confidence of her students, Callas relives her key events in her life through her imagination, which sort of serve as a peephole into her psyche. Her first performance, the jealousy she felt from her former fellow performers, the abortion she had at baby daddy Aristotle Onassis's insistence (even though he originally told her he would love the child she would bear him, if she ever bore him a child, but never her). Perhaps the most vicious revelation is from Callas's final student, who reveals out loud that, after 10 years as a renown opera diva, Callas has lost her voice and is jealous of her students--for they have what she herself will never have again.

McNally's Callas is so complex--you hate her on one page and completely empathize with her on the next.

The published play features a series of photographs from the original Broadway production of Master Class, with Zoe Caldwell portraying Callas. But also of note is that Caldwell's replacement was none other than Patti LuPone. Both performers earned rave reviews during the play's original Broadway run.

Now if only there were a revival...After all it's been almost ten years. Isn't it time? I think so. I just hope it lives up to my imagination...

CD: "Simone On Simone" by Simone (2008)

2008-11-19T22:11:00.009-05:00

"I would like to introduce you to my daughter.

Her name is Simone."

Dr. Nina Simone, Dublin, 1999

These words open the wonderful CD Simone on Simone. The first Simone is the legendary "High Priestess of Soul" Dr. Nina Simone; the latter is her daughter Lisa Celeste Stroud, known professionally as Simone, who sings some of her mother's best known and most beloved songs on this wonderfully emotional and moving tribute to her mom.

Simone has an gorgeous voice, and her range is absolutely exquisite. She's proven this on Broadway as the title role in Aida and as Mimi in the long-running musical Rent. On Simone on Simone, she takes songs identified strongly with her mother and makes them her own. It is not merely a CD of covers or a tribute album, but a celebration of her mother's legacy.

The CD opens with Music For Lovers, a song Simone performed live in Dublin in 1999 accompanied by her mother (who, in addition to having a legendary voice, was also a classically trained pianist) in the fist of the few times mother and daughter shared the stage together. It's a moving piece, with Simone's soaring vocals and Nina's perfect piano accompaniment. Such a special moment to hear from me, a longtime fan of Nina Simone's. After hearing this song, I am proud to say it was love at first note.

Many of the songs selected and performed by Simone on this CD are from her mother's 1966 LPs Wild Is The Wind and High Priestess of Soul, the latter of which was the final album she recorded for the Phillips label. Songs such as Love Me Or Leave Me, Work Song and Gal From Joe's are lively and upbeat, while Don't You Pay Them No Mind (my FAVORITE track from the CD) and I Hold No Grudge weave a spell of reflection and forgiveness.

Keeper of the Flame is one of the most moving songs on the album. Simone is saying she will keep the legacy of her mother's music alive. It's refreshing to hear a performer like Simone, who is the daughter of a famous performer, embrace their parental bond, as opposed to distancing themselves from it (I tell you, everytime I see the E! True Hollywood Story of Goldie Hawn and Kate Hudson, where Kate wants to keep as much professional distance from her mother as possible, quite frankly, it makes me ill...and it makes me feel sorry for her). I believe Simone is ever conscious the lasting impression her mother's music has made, and she's committed to keeping it alive as the song title states...she's the Keeper of the Flame, and she's proud to be the bearer of that torch.

I also loved what Simone did with one of Nina's best-known songs (the song she usually opens her concerts with), Black is the Color of My True Love's Hair. Nina originally sag the song with her piano as her only accompaniment to her soulful vocal. Simone, on the other hand, performs the first verse acapella, slowly bring the piano on the track, then transforms the track with new lyrics and a funky beat. I found it to be a very original and innovative take on the song, and I thought it was terrific.

Out of all of the incredible songs included on the CD, there are three particular songs that stand out as my favorite tracks. Simone's fiery rendition of Go To Hell is phenomenal; her version is Feeling' Good is kick-ass; and her original composition, Child in Me, is a beautiful and deeply moving song of Simone's experiences as the child of a famous mother whose travels all over the world took her away from her, and always brought her back to the daughter she adored.

The CD simply ends with applause and two words spoken by Nina Simone herself..."My baby."

Nina would be proud.

Eventually (hopefully with her next collection) I would love to hear Simone interpret some of her mother's classic compositions, such as the perennial Four Women and the searing Mississippi Goddam.

I first heard the entire CD in my brother's car during his annual birthday trip with me. He had seen Simone in concert two days before in Williamsport and really wanted the CD. So I found a single copy for him at Border's; then when I heard it, I knew I wanted my own copy. However, no other store we stopped at (and we stopped at a lot of stores) had it in stock. But my luck changed when we stopped at Barnes & Noble for his promised Cheesecake Factory dessert that he found a misshelved copy of Simone on Simone for my very own.

And the best news of all? For my upcoming birthday, my brother got me a ticket for Simone in concert. Third-row, center. Can't wait.

I also want to say that, back in 2000, I also had the pleasure of seeing Simone's mother, the late great Dr. Nina Simone herself in concert in Philadelphia. But that's a future blog entry...

Called Out of Darkness: A Spiritual Confession by Anne Rice (2008)

2008-11-18T22:37:00.007-05:00

I can imagine many fans of the novels of Anne Rice were surprised that her first memoir, Called Out of Darkness: A Spiritual Confession, is not about her life as a writer; rather, it is about her life as a Catholic and the role of faith in her life.

Rice beautifully describes her life as a child being enveloped in Catholicism---the masses, the sacraments, her experiences as a student in Catholic school, the religious holidays (Nativity scenes set up at churches in New Orleans at the beginning of November, and the Stations of the Cross during Lent)--which, being a Catholic my own darn self, I strongly related to. She was also a child with a strong sense of family and what family meant to her. One revelation that was quite surprising to me was that she was not a big reader as a child; she was more of a listener--to stories and poem told to her by the mother she loved, and the celebrations of Mass in Latin.

Upon entering college in 1960, at the age of 19, several factors in Rice's life (including her gender and the turbulent era in which she lived at the time) led her to renounce the Catholicism of her childhood and proclaim herself an atheist. The reasons she chooses this radical shift from devout faith in a supreme being to no faith in a supreme being had many complicated factors. But Anne finished college, married poet Stan Rice, had two children (one tragically died at the age of five), and became a bestselling novelist specializing in vampires and erotica.

Rice remained an atheist for 38 years until she felt she was called back to Catholicism. After slipping into a diabetic coma in 1998, Rice slowly but surely regained her faith. She now devotes her writing to God and has since published a series of religious books based on the early life of Jesus Christ.

I admit I am not a huge fan of overtly religious literature, fiction or nonfiction, but Rice's memoir really pulled me in. Her journey full circle from Catholic to atheist to Catholic was very intriguing. However, being a fan of Rice's fiction, particularly The Vampire Chronicles, I was a little disappointed that her memoir gave little insight into her life as a writer, the inspiration of her characters, and her success as a novelist.

But remember this was not her intentions with this book. It is not the autobiography of an author; it's the autobiography of a devout Catholic who happens to be an author. Also, her passion for her new found religion is quite admirable.

However, some may view her devotion as overzealous, and even the hugest Anne Rice devotees will be turned off by the book simply for this aspect, which is a shame because it is well-written and fascinating to read, regardless of one's religious persuasion (if any). Her prose in her memoir is just as vivid and beautiful as her gothic fiction (which she does not renounce, by the way, regardless of her rediscovered faith).

Anne Rice makes it know that she stands by her life, her choices, and her work--and this is admirable in itself.

But to be frank, the main idea I took away from Called Out Of Darkness: A Spiritual Confession is that it is essential for every person to define their own religious beliefs for himself/herself and equally essential not to be coerced into a particular dogma. Faith is a personal thing, it's a private thing and, as with Anne Rice's life, it can change your outlook on everything for the better...or for the worst.

CD: Patti LuPone at Les Mouches (2008)

2008-11-17T21:38:00.004-05:00

The year was 1980, and for 27 weeks at midnight during her career-defining and Tony Award winning run as Evita, Patti LuPone donned a tuxedo and performed a legendary concert at the nightclub Les Mouches. This amazing CD, recorded on the soundboard (pre-digital) at the nightclub and collected from several of these performances, the owner of the tapes, Ms. LuPone herself, deemed them to be too poor quality for commercial release and refused to release them for 28 years. Bootlegs and memories were all that existed...until the CD of her performances was finally released last year.

I admit I was a little disappointed when I heard the first half of the CD. NOT with Ms. LuPone, who is wonderful, but with the overall sound quality of the CD. Full of hisses and imperfections, though the audio was digitally remastered, it sounded like a 3rd generation bootleg of a bootleg. And even back in the genesis of her career, Ms. LuPone was (and remains) a belter...she sang the song, she acted out the song, she practically lived the song as if it was the last song she will ever sing. And listening to that belter of a voice on a less-than-awesome quality recording on a CD Walkman actually started to give me a headache.

Then all of a sudden, the quality of the recording became secondary for me and I concentrated on LuPone's performance itself, which totally knocked my socks off. When the CD ended, I immediately played it again from start to finish and was, again, blown away. I had to remind myself that Patti LuPone at Les Mouches was an event that was meant to be experienced live and in person. It was never intended for a commercial release, but I'm so grateful that it was. Being 6 in 1980 and not knowing who Patti LuPone was until a few short years ago, I wish I could go back in time and experience one of these monumental performance in person.

Patti was very free and eclectic with her section of material for these legendary performances. She starts with Latin From Manhattan and hardly takes a breathe for the remainder of her performance. Yes, of course, she performs Rainbow High and Don't Cry For Me Argentina from Evita, but she also sings Petula Clark's Downtown, Patti Smith's Because The Night, Bob Dylan's Mr. Tambourine Man, and the ultra-campy number Heaven Is A Disco (where she is taunted behind the velvet rope at Studio 54 by none other than Donna Summer). She took a lot of chances and made each song her own. The highlight for me with her emotional rendering of Meadowlark, which she first performed in the original cast of the didn't-quite-make-it-to-Broadway Stephen Schwartz musical The Baker's Wife.

Plus you can tell she's having a great time performing, not a hint of exhaustion in her voice from that Saturday's evening performance of Evita just two hours before. Just listening to her giddiness, her banter with the audience, and the 700+ "Thank Yous" she genuinely exclaims after each number made me believe she had the time of her life at each of these performances.

Aside from the less-than-stellar sound quality (which I understand, as I've explained), the only other criticism I have for the CD was the number of false endings (thing as in LOTR: Return of the King false endings and multiply it by two) of the CD. At the end of most of the last six track, she says, "Thank you! I love you! GOODNIGHT!," then a noticeable edit (audience goes silent in less than a second) and she's on to another song. But, then again, I understand that the CD was culled from several of her 27 total performances at Les Mouches.

And despite the not-exactly-perfect sound quality of the CD overall, I'd rather have this performance of Patti LuPone with all of its imperfections than not having it at all. It's fantastic.

Patti LuPone at Les Mouches is a time capsule to the performer LuPone was ...and a testament to the performer LuPone has become.

Sheer genius!

Forbidden Hollywood: Vol. I (2006) and Vol. II (2008)

2008-11-16T21:01:00.005-05:00

I was so completely fascinated by the documentary Why Be Good? Sexuality and Censorship in Early Cinema, that I decided to pair it/continue it was a documentary I also loved that was on a DVD box set titled Forbidden Hollywood: Vol. II. More on that in a second.

Thou Shalt Not: Sex, Sin and Censorship in Pre-Code Hollywood is an hour-long documentary that covers the period immediately following Why Be Good?. 1930-1934, considered by many film historians as one of the most dynamic eras of Hollywood history where sex, religion and politics were the name of the game both on- and off-screen. Though interviews with such people as Hugh Hefner, director John Landis, and feminist icon Camille Paglia, the hour-long film traces the evolution from the long-ignored Hays Office code to the enforcement of an official Production Code of 1934 and the influence of Joseph Breen and the Catholic Legion of Decency on Hollywood films. Some of the clips shown from those pre-code Hollywood days are quite shocking with the level of sex and violence that slipped past the eyes of the ever-present Hollywood censors. My favorite clip was of a cartoon titled Bosco's Picture show, where the animated I-Don't-Know-What-He-Actually-Is character of Bosco actually seems to say, That dirty fuck!". Did I hear something I wanted to hear, or did he actually say it?

Since I'm on the topic, I might as well strongly recommend the DVD box sets of Forbidden Hollywood, which show off some of the best of the more shocking-but-excellent films of the pre-Code Hollywood era of the early 1930s.

VOLUME I:

Red-Headed Woman (1932)-A red-headed Jean Harlow proceeds to seduce her married boss, then become his wife and take him to the cleaners--all while sleeping with anyone and everyone she chooses. One of the more shocking lines comes from Harlow herself who, when slapped by her married boss, exclaims, "Do it Again! I like it!"

Waterloo Bridge (1931)--In London, a WWI soldier falls in love with a woman whom he later learns is a prostitute. Bette Davis appears in a featured role as one of the soldier's sisters.

Baby Face (1933)--The catalyst that most critics agree was the film that was single-handedly responsible for the creation of 1934's Production Code. Barbara Stanwyck is amazing as a young woman who literally sleeps her way to the top of a New York City bank, floor-by-floor and with zero remorse. Two versions of Baby Face are included in the this collection--the first is the heavily-censored theatrical release, and the second is an uncut and uncensored print discovered in the Library of Congress in 2004.

VOLUME II:

The Divorcee (1930)--When a young married woman discovers her husband has been unfaithful, she "settles their accounts" by sleeping with his best friend. She sees her husband's angry reaction as pure hypocrisy, so she divorces him and sleeps with every man she can. Shearer won an Oscar for Best Actress for this film.

A Free Soul (1931)--After her alcoholic lawyer father defends a mobster, the acquitted begins a seedy affair with the attorney's daughter.

Three On A Match (1932)--Three young girls meet while living at an orphanage and become lifelong friends. Their lives have all taken various paths--especially Vivian's who left her husband for a mobster and becomes a neglectful mother and a drug addict. Humphrey Bogart appears in a small role as a mobster.

Female (1933)--Ruth Chatterton stars as a powerful owner and manager of a highly successful auto company. By day, she's no-nonsense and all business; by night, she sleeps with one of her male employees each night.

Night Nurse (1931)--Barbara Stanwyck stars in another controversial pre-Code film. This time, she's a nurse willing to risk her job and her life to protect a sick child in danger. Clark Gable also stars as a sadistic chauffeur.

Thou Shalt Not: Sex, Sin and Censorship in Pre-Code Hollywood (2008)--An excellent documentary of Hollywood films before the production Code of 1934.

Can't wait for Volume III of Forbidden Hollywood.

Why Be Good? Sexuality And Censorship In Early Cinema (2008)

2008-11-16T16:05:00.004-05:00

I am fascinated by early Hollywood (sometimes referred to as The Golden Age of Hollywood). Movies seemed so much better from that period (unlike today, it's hard to find a stinker made during that time), movie stars were bigger than life, and it all seemed like something otherworldly and unobtainable.

Narrated by Diane Lane, and produced by Hugh Hefner (and featuring his ex-girlfriend and "Girl Next Door" Holly Madison attired as a flapper in the transitions between themes), Why Be Good? is an entertaining and absorbing documentary about the dawn of motion pictures (from about 1890 to 1935), when filmmakers were aware of the existence of a Hays Code of morality on film, but barely acknowledged it. The 70 minute film concludes with the formation of the Catholic Legion of Decency of 1933 and the strict enforcement of the Production Code of 1934, which was strictly adhered to until the creation of the MPAA ratings system in the mid-1960s. From 1933 on, there were a rigid set of rules for Hollywood filmmakers regarding what they can show (e.g. adulterous behavior must be punished in the end, usually by death; kisses cannot last beyond such-and-such seconds and must never be open-mouth; explicit violence is implied and "shown" off-screen only) that must be followed, or be cut--either the film or the career of the actor, director, writer, etc.; or both in many cases.

This censorship applied not only to what was shown on-screen, but also to what the stars did off-screen via strict and nonnegotiable moral clauses placed in the contracts of major Hollywood players. Therefore, that old adage that studios "owned" you even before your signature was dry on your contract also meant that your personal life must live up to those same standards. Some stars, like Louise Brooks and Clara Bow, bucked with the system and lived the way they wanted to off-screen; but, as the documentary shows, they paid a price professionally for it as well.

The film's major focus is on the silent cinema and the legends that came out of it, such as Rudolph Valentino, Clara Bow, Gloria Swanson, Louise Brooks, and Mary Pickford. I was also absolutely amazed that this film included actual filmed interviews with a reflective Louise Brooks, years after she left Hollywood, as well as audio bites from both Swanson and Pickford, giving the actors' points-of-view, which was fascinating to watch and hear.

Near the end of the documentary, an interviewee poses the following question: "Did these films become classics because of the Production Code...or did these films become classics despite it?" No matter if we personally believe the former or the latter to be true, I'm certain we all agree that censorship (particularly in the Golden Age of Hollywood) has inspired some fantastic documentaries on the subject.

Silent Bob Speaks: The Collected Writings of Kevin Smith (2005)

2008-11-15T21:04:00.003-05:00

Yes, I guess I must be on a Kevin Smith kick as of late. Or maybe it's a Kevin Smith phase. It's weird. Sometimes when I watch or read or listen to something by a particular person, I want to watch/read/listen to more by that person. The I'm off to someone else. Ain't life grand?

So after watching the DVD Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith earlier this week, I decided just for the hell of it o experience more of his stuff. Surprisingly, I discovered that Kevin Smith has authored two books of essays. I had no idea this was the case, aside from the book for of his funny-as-hell screenplays.

So I picked up his first book Silent Bob Speaks: The Collected Writings of Kevin Smith and, I kid you not, I couldn't put it down once I picked it up. I read the entire book (325 pages, not nearly enough) in less than two days--I was so entertained by it. It was funny and insightful into his life and his films.

The book primarily contains articles previously written by Smith and previously published in several periodicals. The first part of the book focuses on the preproduction of Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, and the last part of the book focuses on the production of Jersey Girl. In between are interviews with Smith's friend and frequent star Ben Affleck and (believe it or not) Tom Cruise. Being Kevin Smith, of course, some of his essays range in pure outrageousness. Topics include his silly-but-justified beef with "Greasy Reese Witherspoon", the culture of Britney Spears, an advance home screening of Spiderman, his battle with obesity, his wife Jen posing nude for a painting, his first lap dance, and hate mail.

The book is a hoot. It made me laugh and, as I said, I simply couldn't put it down until I finished the last page. I particularly liked the parts about Jersey Girl where Smith claims every step of the way that it was the best film he's ever done and how close Bennifer is (now was). I really liked Jersey Girl myself, but Smith has definitely altered his opinion of this film since Silent Bob Speaks was published (just watch any of his "An Evening With Kevin Smith" and you'll hear him loud and clear).

I loved this book a lot.

Keeps Gettin' Better: A Decade of Hits by Christina Aguilera (2008)

2008-11-15T20:17:00.009-05:00

By now I am certain you realize that my tastes in entertainment and all things pop culture run the gamut--this can also be said for my musical tastes. With few exceptions (rap and hip-hop), chances are I'll give anything a spin once because I love all different types of music: rock, pop, jazz (regular, as well as the smooth kind), R&B, easy listening, Broadway stuff, and even a tad of country) are all represented in my CD collection. And yes, Christina Aguilera is in there as well.

Over the past forty years, the music scene of the last four or five years of each specific decade has had an influx of teen pop, or bubblegum pop. In the late 70s, it was Shaun Cassidy and Donny & Marie. The late 80s brought us the New Kids on the Block, Tiffany and Debbie (excuse me, DEBORAH) Gibson. The late 90s had the Backstreet Boys, N'Sync, Hanson, The Spice Girls, Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. Even the last few years of the first decade of the new millennium has the Jonus Brothers and Miley Cyrus. It's almost like each decade must musically conclude with happy, care-free (some may say empty) music sung by pretty young people. To be honest I mostly aschewed this music because it honestly wasn't really my bag--my musical tastes were always in the non top40; however, I'm not going to deny that I didn't turn the station when they came on the radio--I even bobbed my head along with them (don't deny it, you did, too).

But I find the late 90s the most interesting of these years because, unlike most pop stars specifically marketed to the teen scene, two of the breakout stars have demonstrated continuous and steady staying power ten years after their respective debuts, rather that fading into obscurity a mere four years into the next decade.

Yes, they are Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. And I enjoy them both, so what? Britney simply leaks the tabloid fodder that I love (I watch E! News religiously every night), and Christina Aguilera simply has an amazing voice. She's a belter (who doesn't love a good belter?), she writes most of her songs, and her sound really did change and progress and strengthen from with each new CD (as opposed to others who chant "This new album is so different from the last one" and it's essentially just the same CD with a new title). After all, she's won five Grammy Awards, had 6 #1 singles, and has turned out relatively normal after the rollercoaster of fame (in other words, I think she still has all of her own hair).

That being said, I purchased Miss Aguilera's Target Exclusive Deluxe Edition CD/DVD combo of her greatest hits collection titled Keeps Gettin' Better: A Decade of Hits.

And I really enjoyed it. It's good. Really good. Great, in fact, I will say.

The CD features 10 of her hit songs from the past decade, where you can actually hear and chart the progression of her music. She also includes two new tracks (the title track, Keeps Gettin' Better, and a new tune called Dynamite) and even they are different from the previous tracks. In addition, she also recorded new versions of two of her biggest hits--Genie 2.0 (Genie in a Bottle) and You Are What You Are (Beautiful). These two tracks, I wasn't so crazy about. Why update and change something that was fine to begin with?

The DVD features 10 videos for the first 10 songs (AKA The Decade of Hits referred to in the title). It's a nice edition to the package. Most of the videos I've never seen before. But all were entertaining. I thought the video for Dirrty was HILARIOUS, and the trio of videos from her last full-length CD Back To Basics were fun, particularly Candyman (where Aguilera sexes up the Bette Midler Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy clip of the 70s and portrays three versions of herself--each with different hair color--as a 40s all-girl trio.

I'm glad I bought it. So what?

On a side note, what I absolutely hate is when people complain that MTV doesn't play videos anymore--they just have stupid reality shows. My response? AND?????!!!!!!!!! So what? Watch another channel instead, stop your bitching and moaning. After all, were there really any truly good videos after 1985? Think about it. Honestly. And if you're craving videos, log on and watch the promo clips on YouTube instead...and SMILE, damnit! Cheesy reality shows have been part of MTV longer than they haven't. It's just where pop culture (and, obviously, their audience) wants right now (for some sick reason, but they DO want it nonetheless). So don't show up to the VMAs and collect your stupid awards for your videos that MTV no longer plays. Did you get that loud and clear, Mr. Justin "Ungrateful" Timberfake?

Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith (2008)

2008-11-14T20:02:00.004-05:00

I've been a fan of Kevin Smith since his debut film Clerks in 1994. Since then, Smith has directed some of the funniest movies in recent years: Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, Clerks II...I even thought Jersey Girl was pretty good.

Though the character he plays in his films, Silent Bob, rarely utters a word, Kevin Smith himself has a lot to say--all of it intersting and all of it hysterically funny.

Smith's speaking engagements at college campuses throughout the country have been documents on three 2-disc DVD collections: An Evening With Kevin Smith; An Evening With Kevin Smith: Even Harder; and the recently released Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith, which I just finished watching.

Following the format of the previous two releases, Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith features Smith speaking in front of a sold-out crowd of fans in film buffs. Unlike the other two sets, however, this time Smith is speaking on his home turf of New Jersey on his 37th birthday.

Yes, Kevin Smith may not be for all tastes. He's frank, he's blunt, and he has a lot of profanity (you can play the game "See How Many Times Kevin Says The Phrase 'Shit Like That' Drinking Game" and get drunker that you've ever been in your life).

BUT Kevin Smith is a dynamic speaker and an even more dynamic storyteller. He's always engaging, no matter what the audience question is. He makes even the crudest stories sound sweet and charming, and he always respects his audience.

Following some footage visiting the hospital in New Jersey where he was born, Smith is introduced by his wife and daughter. From there on in, it's just Kevin Smith and the audience. Sharing the stage with Kevin are a huge blown-up photo of himself as a baby, a few bottles of water, and several towels (even Smith admits he sweats a lot on stage). Smith begins with a little research he's done on the little-known St. Kevin that he's done on the Internet. Then the rest of the 3-hour-but-never-feels-like-3-hours program is devoted to questions from his fans in the audience. Everything from his feelings about making a kids movie one day (in which he spends nearly an hour sharing why his experiences with his dogs would make this unlikely), his love of comic books and sci-fi, his encounters with celebrities like Bruce Willis (his story of working with Willis on Live Free or Die Hard is unbelievably hysterical) , and his experiences as an actor as well as a director. He never shys away from even the most embarrassing situations, such as his experience serving on jury duty while dealing with an excruciating hemorrhoid.

In addition to the 222-minute main feature, spread over two discs, the collection also includes over an hour of additional footage from his performance. As a bonus treat, the hysterically funny redband trailer for Zach and Miri Make A Porno opens the first disc.

Although critics may write his films off as nothing but "dick and fart jokes," Kevin proves over and over again that he and his films are much more than that. Sold Out: A Threevening With Kevin Smith is another present to fans of his films and film lovers in general. Perhaps he's not for all tastes but, if not, then it's their loss.

Let's hope part 4 of An Evening with Kevin Smith is released ASAP.

Lady of Burlesque (1943)

2008-11-13T21:38:00.008-05:00

"Read the book." "See the movie."

The eternal argument that can never be won, beautifully and accurately encapsulated in my favorite cartoon from The New Yorker. With any film based on the film, you're going to be disappointed in one and elated with the other. I've been there countless times. Usually, in my case, I love the option I chose first more than the latter. For example, I read the novel Like Water for Chocolate first and LOVED IT; then I saw the film and absolutely hated it. On the flip side, I saw the film Beaches 27 times in the theater in 1989; then I read the novel it was based on and absolutely HATED IT. Your love is typically for one...or the other. Never equally.

However, I didn't feel this way about Lady of Burlesque. I watched the film for the first time several months ago and loved the film. I just finished reading the novel it was based on (The G-String Murders by Gypsy Rose Lee) and I have to admit that I loved the book just as much as I loved the film. This rarely, if ever, happens with me.

Based on the novel The G-String Murders by Gypsy Rose Lee, and directed by William A. Wellman (who also directed Stanwyck in 1931's pre-Code shocker Night Nurse; he also directed 1927's Wings, the first film to win the Academy Award for Best Picture), Lady of Burlesque tells the story of The Old Opera House, a 1920s era theater transformed into a successful house of burlesque (and a target of the fuzz). Amidst the bum comics and cheap strippers that work at The Old Opera House is Dixie Daisy (Barbara Stanwyck, playing the Gypsy Rose Lee-esque character), the reigning queen of burlesque. However, life takes a turn for the worst as strippers start turning up dead, strangled by their own G-strings.

I originally purchased this film on The Barbara Stanwyck Collection, a $4.98 DVD that includes three Stanwyck films in the public domain. However, the print on this particular film was not very good, and the sound was sometimes inaudible. Then, my biggest nightmare. Just when the murderer is about to be revealed, the DVD froze, started to pixelate, and simply would not continue though the final five minutes of the film . This, of course, did not happen with either of the two other films--The Strange Love of Martha Ivers or Meet John Doe. Those other two films were gravy to Lady of Burlesque, the prime reason for this particular purchase. But no harm done. I ended up purchasing Lady of Burlesque as a standalone title for $12.99, released by (of all companies) Troma (the first image above), the guys that brought us The Toxic Avenger. But the print of the film was beautiful and the sound was crystal clear, so the extra purchase was worth it, IMHO.

Lady of Burlesque is a really great classic film, with Barbara Stanwyck in a first-rate performance--she even shows off her singing voice on the clever ditty "Take It Off the E-String, Play It On the G-String." Michael O'Shea was also a lot of fun to watch as Daisy's potential suitor and bum comic foil Biff Brannigan.

Perhaps the thing I loved most about Lady of Burlesque is the fact that Barbara Stanwyck mentions my hometown of Wilkes-Barre in one of the scenes.

I LOVED Lady of Burlesque, and I LOVED the novel it was based on. And that, my fellow bloggers, is a rarity.

The entire film is available on YouTube. To hear the Wilkes-Barre reference, fast-forward to the two-minute mark of this clip. Otherwise, feel free to watch the film from the beginning, beginning with the first 10 minutes below:

A Day Out With My Brother J.R. (Wednesday, November 12th)

2008-11-13T18:41:00.004-05:00

My brother's birthday is November 20th. So every year around this time, the two of us plan something special and spend the entire day together. Last year, we spent the day in New York City catching the hottest Broadway show in town, Young Frankenstein less than two weeks after it opened (having purchased excellent seats a mere few days earlier and starting the journey through a blizzard).

My brother JR really wasn’t interested in any of the shows playing on Broadway this year. So we decided to take a trip to East Stroudsburg to visit the Main Street Jukebox, an amazing record store that specializes in used vinyl, and work our way home from there. So I took a personal day off from work, and we were rarin' to go.

His other goals? Stopping at Barnes & Noble for a slice of Cheesecake Factory cheesecake. And finding a copy of the CD Simone On Simone (more on that fantastic CD in a future entry).

After breakfast at Burger King, we made the hour-long trek to East Stroudsburg, PA. We spend nearly 5 hours at the Main Street Jukebox looking at the fifty-cent and dollar used records---we were in heaven. I bought a few records, as did JR; I'm still debating on revealing in my blog some of the titles I purchased (Christmas Disco, anyone?), but we'll see. Fantastic.

Then we stopped at the Stoud Mall for some Arthur Treacher's; we always stop for Arthur treacher's in East Stroudsburg because there are none in existence in our area anymore. After the feast,we hit the usual spots---Borders, FYE, Best Buy, Circuit City, and the like. We had an awesome time.

I found a copy of Simone On Simone for JR's birthday present at Borders. After listening to it in the car, I desperately wanted my own copy, which we found (misshelved) at Barnes & Noble.

After 12 hours, JR dropped me off at home and was on his way back to his. We had such a great time. Being so busy with work and such (I'm a librarian, he owns his own small business), and being in our mid-30s, it can sometimes be hard to spend a few hours (let alone a whole day) with your brother or your best friend. JR is both to me and, though our schedules rarely permit it as much as we'd like, we still manage to spend some quality time together and have awesome consumer experiences as well.

Happy 35th, JR! Love ya!

The G-String Murders by Gypsy Rose Lee (1942)

2008-11-11T22:38:00.004-05:00

Long before her life story because the quintessential Broadway musical Gypsy, Gypsy Rose Lee (AKA Rose Louise Havoc) had led a lot of life. She was on the vaudeville circuit at the age of 5, a striptease artist at the age of 15, and the reigning Queen of Burlesque by the age of 20.

But Gypsy Rose Lee was also an author. In addition to penning her memoirs that would later inspire Gypsy: A Musical Fable, she used her experiences in burlesque to pen the fictional mystery The G-String Murders: The Story of A Burlesque Girl, originally published in 1942.

Casting herself as the main character, Gyspy Rose Lee is the main protagonist in The G-String Murders, a legendary stripper who is hired at the Old Opera House in New York City. Once the home of NYC opera, the tarnished building is now the site of the best burlesque acts in town. Striptease artists, bum comedians, the works.

Her new workplace is filled with a wide array of characters, including: Biff, the annoying comic she secretly pines for; The Princess, an uppity specialty dance with an ego the size of the Opera House itself; and Alice, the stripper with a lisp.

Though friendships and alliances form amongst the strippers, backstabbing and one-upping are generally the rules of the trade.

This all changes, however, when La Verne, one of the strippers, is found murdered--strangled by her own glittering G-string. Then another stripper turns up dead, G-string tied around the neck.

Who is responsible for these horrific murders? Was it her jealous boyfriend? Was it the mysterious handyman? Or did Gypsy do it?

Lee weaves a funny and entertaining story about the backstage drama of the burlesque theaters of the 1920s. At times, there were too many characters to keep track of--and of course, it isn't Tolstoy, but it's readable and fun and a good mystery is thrown in for good measure that will keep you guessing until the last page.

One year after its original publication, The G-String Murders was adapted to the screen as Lady of Burlesque, starring Barbara Stanwyck in the Gypsy Rose Lee role (rechristened Dixie Daisy). And, as an added surprise, Barbara Stanwyck's character makes a reference to my hometown of Wilkes-Barre in her dialogue in the film.

Also of note is, towards the end of the novel, Gyspy states that she feels like Stella Dallas--Barbara Stanwyck, who plays the Gypsy role in the film version, Lady of Burlesque, played the title role of Stella Dallas in the 1937 film (earning her first Ocsar nomination for Best Actress).